Heslin and the Yellow Peril
This is one for the more "mature" (ancient) B3tans out there...

It would be the late 50s early 60s when Bof was only about 7.
Heslin was a PE teacher. (so was 'Nancy' but I won't go there).
As it was after the war, I can only assume that Heslin was a fitness instructor in the forces and a really nasty bastard to boot (hmmm... boot camp?)
At the start of the lesson, we had to line up for a kit inspection.
Is it clean? Is your name clear and present on it? Do I like to look of your arse? (well, maybe not that one)
Take one step, two steps or even 3 steps forward.

Then out came Yellow Peril... it was an old plimsole and his instrument of torture.
"One pace forward brigade, touch your toes!"
Then along the line he went... *Crack*, *Crack*, *Crack* until this phase of his mission was completed
"Two pace forward brigade, touch your toes!"
*Crack-Crack*, *Crack-Crack*, *Crack-Crack*, *Crack-Crack* until he was finished
"Three pace....." I think you get the gist.
A complete and utter masochist to 7-8 year old kids.

Someone stole Yellow Peril and became a hero overnight.

I found out afterwards that Heslin also thought of himself as a Greyhound racer.
He bought a dog and taking by taxi to it's first race,the bloody thing died. He did what anyone would do, I guess, he stopped the cab pushed the carcass out onto the side of the road and drove off.

Just an everyday event in Glasgow.
(bof, Fri 20 Nov 2009, 15:45, Reply)