This tale has been doing the rounds at bashes and on /talk for a whle now so it's time to share...
...I call this tale 'The Most Disgusting Thing I ever Saw' or for those in the know, 'THAT story'.

Anyway.
About 8 years back I was a student nurse coming into my final year.
As part of my final year you get to do two 'trauma' placements in areas like ICU, A&E or theatres. Mine involved being sent to theatres.

On the day of this tale I was detailed to work in a partiular theatre on the urology list. the list for the day comprised exclusively circumcisions, mainly in young lads who'd got a phimosis.
Finally the last customer of the morning comes in.
Gentleman in his 60's, rather shy, had needed YEARS of nagging by his wife to get it seen to apparently.

The first stage of the op, once the patient is safely aneasthetised is for the surgeon, or his assistant to 'prepare' the area for sugery.
In the case of a circumcision this involves yanking down the tight collar of the world's smallest polo neck and cleaning underneath.

Well.
Operating theatres are often warm places, which tends to make them PARTICULARLY fragrant after a long session in there.
The foreskin came back to reveal that this chap had quite possibly never washed under it his whole adult life, it must have been inches thick with knob cheese, but, mercifully, there was no smell.
So the surgeon whips out his forceps and gauze and begins cleaning.

Did I mention that it was last case of the morning?

Keen to get out for his urgent appointment with the golf course the surgeon set about prepaing the area vigourously.
The cheese was EVERYWHERE, including into the goggles of his assistant and the scrub nurse, the overhead lights, the patient's ear and as a coup de grace, the aneasthetist's cup of water, which the aformentioned gasman then drank.

Worst thing about the whole affair?

The SMELL.

Like cheap mozzarella.

Gone off.

And then eaten and sicked up by the dog.

Length? slightly less than it was before but nice and clean now.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 28 Mar 2007, 8:30, Reply)