Her Majesty's Motherfucking Revenue Cunts
You'll have to travel a long, long way to get as obnoxiously petty as the massive pricks "employed" by HMRC.

The Kafkaesque experience of having to phone day after day and speak to person after clueless fucking person just to convince them that I didn't know the value of a received taxable benefit - a value that they knew TO THE PENNY - but wouldn't tell me so I could fill the form out.

Q. "Could you tell me the value so I can fill your form out?".
A. "No".
( Linbox has a serious dunk habit, Sat 29 Mar 2014, 2:27, 5 replies)

So your story is that you can't keep track of a single figure in your accounts?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 29 Mar 2014, 11:33, closed)

Maybe, just maybe, if you hadn't been TOO FUCKING LAZY TO READ THE FUCKING PAPERWORK, you wouldn't have had to waste their time by phoning them day after day.
Honestly, if you're too idle, or too stupid to fill out a simple form correctly, maybe you should pay an accountant to do it for you, rather than blaming someone else for your own shortcomings.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sat 29 Mar 2014, 12:08, closed)

Bit harsh.
I mean ... if he were that much of a number idiot he'd not know that taxable benefits are rounded down to the nearest pound so he doesn't need to worry about the pennies ... oh.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 29 Mar 2014, 12:25, closed)

^twat

( eXOBeX, Sat 29 Mar 2014, 16:34, closed)

I've always found the people on the other end of the phone pretty helpful
They know they work for a shitty disorganised government department and are happy to joke about it (for example when documents you send to them by recorded delivery or deliver by hand go missing).

The only exception was when they 'lost' 11 months worth of student loan repayment from me. The guy claimed they have nothing to do with student loans and to stop wasting his time.
The student loan people sorted it out pretty quickly, it was HMRC's cock up.
( thistle, Mon 31 Mar 2014, 19:40, closed)