"Spidershitbuggeragh!"
Like almost everyone else here, or so it seems, I'm an arachnophobic. I hate other insects too, namely disgusting horrible vomit-inducing wiggly grubs (but I shall not go into that as it'll make my skin crawl even worse than spiders). However, the spindly legs, tiny bodies, ability to creep and crawl and then **attach themselves to anything with web** means that I loose sense and control when ever I so much as think I see a spider.

You easily know when I've spotted one. I scream. Loudly. And swear. Alot. This is usually followed by an extreme amount of hopping about as if I'm trying not to touch the floor.

Aswell as providing much hilarity to my family, my fear of spiders has also crept into my sleep.

It started a while ago on holiday in Oban. I share a room with my sister so every "spider attack" has happened with her present. I half woke up and was still dreaming, even though I could see my real surroundings. There it was. On my pillow. Right by my head.

A prawn.

"Aghshitbuggerfuckingshitsaaaaaagh!" was followed by me bamming on the lights and being completely confused as I woke up and tried to locate the spider, convinced it was still there in my bed.

I've not topped a prawn yet, but I have almost brought my sister to heart attack several times convinced the spider is on her too.

Now however, I know when I've made it up and after my usual bout of rather passionate swearing, I'll just get back into bed and fall asleep, leaving my sister in a bleary eyed state of shock.

Strangely enough, I enjoy hallucinating about the spiders (and other things but I shall save that for another time) as it always makes me laugh in the mornings meaning I start the day with a huge smile on my face.

Don't put me near a real one though or I'll kill you.
( vix0r was not Matthew on, Wed 16 Apr 2008, 17:07, Reply)