randy farm hand
As a teenager i decided that I wanted to be a vet 'when i grow up', so to get the necessary experience, I began volunteering at 2 local farms and Riding for the Disabled. It was at the most local farm that i met randy farm hand (rfh/danny).

Every weekend he would follow me round like a lovesick puppy or show me how macho he was by wrestling sheep to the ground. The farmer thought it was hilarious, his wife thought it was adorable, i was just hugely feaked out by it all, being young, naive, and, well, educated (rfh was 2 years older than me, but could barely count to ten, dropped out of school at 15, and wanted to be a full time farm hand for the rest of his life. oh, and i was a total intellectual snob.).

rfh eventually took to asking me out every weekend, and every weekend i'd say no, thank you (hey, i'm well mannered even in a rejection!), and we'd be awkward around eachother until lunch time, then the same thing would happen the following saturday and sunday. ho hum.

i got very fed up with this after a while, especially when it escalated to him asking me every ten minutes or so whilst we were helping a cow with a particularly difficult delivery - i had my hands inside a cow, was sweating like a politician being asked to tell the truth, and was NOT interested in his crap. This was helped by the poor cow mooing and moaning as she tried to push the huge calf out of her back end. Eventually the calf was born, and we had to watch the cow for a couple of hours, as it had been a very bad labour. rfh ket on with his attempts to wear me down, and was annoying me TOO much. so when the placenta was delivered, i picked up the warm wet heavy mass, slopped it over his head, whilst shouting 'NO I DO NOT WANT TO GO OUT WITH YOU!!!'.

he got the message, and joined the navy two days later (i wish i were joking).

apologies for length, it was a difficult birth.
( ascorbate, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 13:49, 4 replies)

hahaha!
Sheep wrestling, afterbirth and navy-joining gets a big click!
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 13:51, closed)

I Can Tell You
The secret of the SHIFT key if you want.

It might help. It might make your post look like it wasn't written by a 12 year old chav.

lol


Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 14:02, closed)

I like farm animals
and recognize at least 3 kinds of them.
that is why you get a click
(Doctor Beat, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 14:23, closed)

For the placenta,
you get a click.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 22:06, closed)