Wet leg
Years ago I had to communte for a few months from London Bridge to Sevenoaks on the train (a journey of 45 minutes of so). One night, I got on the train mid-rush hour, and the only available seat was next to a guy who seemed to be asleep against the window. No problem I thought - it was a bit of a squeeze because he was slightly slumped across my seat but never mind.

The journey was uneventful, but when I got off at Sevenoaks into a windy night, I started to feel that my right leg was very cold. I reached down and found that my trouser leg was sopping wet.

What I'd taken for "asleep" must have been "passed out drunk". The guy had slowly pissed himself in his sleep. I hadn't noticed his body temperature wee at all because I was pressed against him anyway, and distracted by the book I was reading.

I stopped at the offy and bought six beers with an immediate view to drowning my sorrows the moment I got home. The cheery Aussie guy behind the counter ran them through the till and said, Celebrating?"
"No," I replied, "just drinking. A man weed on me."
( expf, Fri 30 May 2008, 7:55, Reply)