You work it out
I worked a few years back (my first job in Holland) for a Software company who used to punt me out to various clients for fat profit, but with the security of a full time job for me (which meant if I had no work, I sat on my arse at home on full pay, which was nice).

On my first day, I was punted out to a very large Japanese Motorcycle Company to look after their AS/400 systems - I got the impression on the first day though that the boss was a bit odd, but being my first proper job in Holland, I knuckled down and gave it my all.

During the first few months I worked hard (though humngover a lot) - I improved various processes that were well out of date, automated various operations and did my best to impress. The Boss however, who I learned was only in charge of IT as he knew how a PC worked when they got their first ever one in a millenium ago, obviously didn't like me. Every week my timesheet was either to brief or too detailed (one week I made a difference of one word on the last weeks to prove the theory he just alternated whatever he said last week - it did). I was also entrusted with documenting Y2K readiness of kit and spent a lot of time writing an 87 page document, only for him one day to then say he'd never even requested it in the first place (though me and three other people were all asked to create it). He'd also call me at 11pm at night asking why the computer room door was open, when I had left early in the afternoon and was not the last person there.

Then the company decided to centralise all their european AS/400 systems on to one model 620, with a fram relay link to all the sub offices, with Austria to go first. This went on for a while, and a UK manager was brought in to oversee the project - strangely the UK manager's wife had worked at my previous contract in the UK - so we got on well, as did the job in hand, until one day when we lost all the sessions in Vienna for no reason whatsoever. AS/400 users will know these things report everything, so when nothing appeared in the system logs to even notice the outtage, we were a bit concerned. This carried on quite randomly, sometimes several times a day, sometimes not for weeks. We called IBM in, Global One (the Frame Relay Operators), even GeTronics for the local network, and all this after draining the excellent technical knowledge of the employees in the department. We tried everything - we even flew to Vienna just sitting there waiting for it to happen, and then running into the workshop to see if a welder had dipped the current enough to send a spike on the network - we were really clutching at straws. IBM had sent their three top Dutch network consultants in to assist (after I shouted at them for lack of support) and they could not work it out. Meetings were held in Japan about canning the entire project or replacing it with new technology all at great cost.

Then during one of my trawls around the net trying to find answers, I found a parameter within the bowels of IP configuration which did not seem to be documented too well, so after pissing about with a local test system, managed to replicate the problem on a local machine - I reported it to the English boss who excitedly told the Austrian President of the Company, who alerted the Chiefs in Tokyo - the change was made to the Live system and we held our breaths - I for a long time, but after 4 weeks, just a few days before the crucnh meeting to cancel the whole project, Terry came in on a monday morning, gave me 4 bottles of English beer and told me that the Directors at this very large company were thanking "Wayne-san" for saving them millions. IBM rang to thank me, and documented my findings at Rochester in the States for their Guru's to evaluate and correct, and Global One were so grateful as well for obviously not losing their contract for the network infrastructure.

The Dutch imbecile was called into the office about his handling of the whole situation, and especially his shying from the problems, and allowing a contractor to have to show him how to get things done, and he was demoted to just lead operator. He was finally found out for what he was - a fuckwit. Trouble is the fuckwit still had charge of the operations team, which included me, so I was dismissed from the contract. The grounds brought up in the meeting included:

a) I brought a newspaper into work (I used to read on the bus)
b) I did not take home work with me every night (I billed by the hour - you sure you want me billing for 24 x 7?)
c) I did not carry a briefcase to work (Overkill for a newspaper don't you think?)

...needless to say, I was one of many who did the above, but this did not seem to count for them - could it have been they were Dutch?

My Boss at the software company was very supportive and understanding - I offered to resign but he would hear nothing of it. Years later the guy from the Motorbike Company asked him for a job, to which my boss replied "You might have been my best customer for 20 years, but you are a complete dickhead and I would not employ you if you were the last person on earth!"

Not many people I know can honestly say their payback for saving a company so much money is to be shown the door.

Still I did get to lig with the racing team and hang out with some of the worlds most famous riders which was nice
(Waynster James Joyce is fucking my sister!, Sat 25 Feb 2006, 9:18, Reply)