I am definately going to hell for ...
scunnering the school nativity play.

In my defense yurunnah I was 8 and put a smaller kid up to it rather than dirty my own lily white paws.

One of the younger lads at school, a friend of the family and budding thespian, was dead keen on winning the part of Joseph in the nativity play. And sorely wrathful was he when the part went to the snot-nosed, myopic, mumbling spawn of the Art teacher.

I was outraged at this blatant nepotism and my own paltry part as a bunny. So being the budding Machiavellian I was, I set about to wreck the nativity play, seizing upon my younger playmate's crushed ego to accomplish the task.

The night of the play arrived. All the bored looking mums and dads were duly seated. The Art teacher was fussing over the ludicrous headpiece she had made for her numpty part-stealing son.

My pawn had been given the part of the Innkeeper.

I looked on, from under my ridiculous bunny headdress recycled from last Easter's bonnet parade.

Numpty Art teacher spawn and wee lassie with a mighty cushion shoved up her dress enter stage left.

They approach the Innkeeper.

"Mumble mumble cough splutter ... come all the way from Bethelehem for the census ... mumble, cough, wheeze ... missus great with child ... cough, splutter ... got any rooms for the night?"

"Bags of room. Come on in."

Result.
(Que?, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 4:06, Reply)