School bully wanker
I'll never forget the day the school's dimwitted bully got busted having a fine knuckle shuffle under the desk in English class.

Later that day I couldn't resist the urge to call him a massive wanker. Right to his face. He promptly had me in a headlock, having a right go about it. But then I calmly pointed out to him that he was, indeed, a wanker, having been caught in the act in class. He let me go, and duly had to agree, that I wasn't so much calling him names, as making an observation. Incredible how easy it is to talk yourself out of trouble when faced with a dunce of a bully.

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The other funniest thing that happened at our school, is still shrouded in a bit of mystery. A kid called K was the son of one of the teachers. He was at a house party, where everyone was very, very drunk. One guy was passed out in the living room, and everyone else went into the garden. K stayed behind with the unconcious bloke, and proceeded to undo the guys trousers, pull down his pants, and start felating said unconcious bloke. The rest of the revellers returned to the living room to find the disturbing scene, and awoke unconcious bloke.

K came into school the next week with both his arms in plaster casts and supports. Apparently he broke them during gymnastics practise...I'll let you decide if that's the truth.
(Amputated is tickling the exit wound, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 17:59, Reply)