Communication breakdown
I was alright at French at school. While I never had the discipline to learn the grammar properly I had a decent accent and picked up phrases very easily. I was confident, at least verbally.

So, by the time we were a couple of weeks into an A level exchange visit to a school in France, I thought I was fluent. I was wrong.

While sitting in a pub with my new French friends I decided a Gauloise would complement my 'baron' of beer nicely. I was out of matches so asked if anyone had a light. I couldn't work out why everyone started laughing and wouldn't give me the flames I needed. I knew I was holding it round the right way, so I figured my friends were just being French.

I started asking around the rest of the pub and got some very strange looks, especially from the local fishermen.

Had this been my first beer I might have twigged sooner, but it was very far from my first. Not until I'd asked everyone in the bar did my gittish amis enlighten me (and the smoke). It turns out idioms don't translate literally. While I thought I was asking everyone in the pub - male and female - if they had a light, I was really demanding to know exactly how horny they were.

"Avez-vous la feu?" Luckily the answer was an emphatic "Oui!" when I asked Julie later that night.
( Scrumper, Thu 5 Feb 2009, 14:19, Reply)