Aliens
When I was 12 years old my class was given a term project entitled simply ‘Aliens’. Our homework was to create something around the theme of extra-terrestrials and I wanted to go the whole hog, design my own creature from a distant world and present the final piece as a model of the fantastic monster.

Even though it was a month long assignment I left it til the night before it was due in. I set about bastardising a Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles Plaster of Paris kit; I.e use the turtle figure and then stick antennae, fins and all manner of spacey shite onto it afterwards.

I completely ballsed up the Plaster of Paris mixture. I added far too much water and I had no time to go and get a new kit and start again. Instead of the Lucas Arts collectable figurine I’d envisaged I was left with a bowl of grey lumpy gunge that looked a bit like semolina.

Undeterred by this unmitigated disaster, I simply scraped the substance into a clear plastic bag and tied it in a knot.

Cut to next day in class, I unveiled the bag of crap to teacher on a piece of paper with an arrow pointing towards it with the words “Alien Food” written in huge letters.

It got a Gold Star and was the first thing on the class display every entering parent saw at the very next parent’s evening.

Mugs.
(CharlieSomethingElse, Wed 19 Aug 2009, 22:06, Reply)