Shit StoriesI once ate four Kendal Mint Cakes and did a white shit. My old school friend Roger had to outdo me. He claimed to have done a "blue bubbling turd" after eating six packets of blackcurrant Chewits. We want to hear your stories of poo, from crapping yourself at your sisters wedding to shitting the bed during sex. Go on - be filthy.
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rob, Wed 5 May 2004, 22:24)
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Fruit and FibreAh, the joys of parenthood...One particular story concerning my young son that I know will destroy any cockiness in his teenage years, was as follows...Just me and the 2 year old staying at home one day, when I notice the tell-tale niff of nappy filling activity, and look round to see the boy curling off a 'right head-shaker'. Disgruntled that his Mum had gone out before this event, I steeled myself for the necessary nappy change, and put my son in position on his bed.
Popping open the Pampers, I notice that the Tom Tit is as dry as a bone, and looks like a bag of dark brown marbles. Nice. I pick up said soiled nappy, lob it in the bin, turn around and see my boy sitting up straight, looking relieved, naturally. Then, in a horrifying slo-mo moment, I see him look down, and reach for a small poo pebble that had rolled of the nappy, mid-change. Before I could stop him or scream 'Nooooo', he cheerfully said 'RAISIN!' and promptly bit into his own excrement.
Funnily enough, he wasn't impressed with the taste and instantly gobbed it out onto the duvet.
I've now got the perfect retort if ever he ever 'talks shit'...
(, Fri 7 May 2004, 13:24, Reply)
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