ShopliftingWhen I was young and impressionable and on holiday in France, I followed some friends into a sweet shop and we each stole something. I was so mortified by this, I returned them.
My lack of French hampered this somewhat - they had no idea why the small English boy wanted to add some chews to the open box, and saw it as an attempt by a nasty foreigner oik to contaminate their stock. Not my best day.
What have you lifted?
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chthonic, Thu 10 Jan 2008, 11:13)
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Barry the BadgerBarry the Badger claimed to be the greatest shoplifter in Leeds. Very fond of young boys, too, but that's another tale entirely.
He used to steal to order and once told us the story of a commission he was given to provide somebody with an ironing board.
This one had him stumped until he saw one outside a junk shop in the less-than-glamorous streets behind the market. Easy. Ironing board just lined up on the pavement for the taking.
Barry cased the joint, worked out his escape route and decided that a basic grab and run approach was the answer.
So he scooped it up, at a canter, and aimed across the road...followed by a cavalcade of miscellaneous domestic appliances and implements which the canny shopkeeper had chained together when he laid his wares out on the pavement.
Halfway across the road the play on the chain ran out resulting in our man and his reluctant entourage coming to an abrupt and inelegant halt.
One of Barry the Badgers rare failures but the slapstick value more than makes up for it.
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The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 10 Jan 2008, 21:43,
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