Tescos again...and somewhere else...

Only the other day I was watching one of those highly-motivated-Tesco-checkout-spackers runnning my shopping through the scanner.

They were doing it at such a pace that it was only 'beeping' every now and again.

'Hello, what's this' I thought to myself. As I glanced up ours eyes met...I was about to ask what was going on (yes I know I'm a twat), when she gave me the look (and wink) of someone who knew exactly what she was doing...but clearly didn't give a flying monkey's toss.

'Oh, this fucking thing never works properly, and I can't be arsed to try scanning stuff over and over again' she exclaimed, continuing to pass items straight through.

After checking my receipt I found I was about £40 better off than I should've been.

Now I know this isn't technically shoplifting...well not on my part anyway...but it didn't stop me feeling all naughty as I pushed my trolley out the door and past the knuckle dragging mong security guard.

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The second one was performed by the present Mrs Pooflake. She went to a clothes store recently and picked up various items of clothing, including a coat priced at £50 and a woolly hat priced at £2. When it came to the checkout she (innocently) placed the hat on top of the coat.

Can you see where this is going?

the pre-pubescent arse-quack scanned the hat and either assumed that the coat must've come free with it, or that this £50 coat was actually £2.

Either way - thick as fuck - and score 2 to the Pooflakes.

It makes it even better for me to know that the missus is one of those painfully honest-as-the-day-is-long types who abhors all the dodgy stuff I get up to...but there was no mistaking the mischeivous grin and glint in her eye when she returned home to inform me of her result.

Bless her though - she's shit scared to go back there now and has given herself a lifetime ban...I mean, even if the checkout dweeb did recognise her...as if he would care?
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Fri 11 Jan 2008, 9:08, Reply)