Your first cigaretteTo be honest, inhaling the fumes from some burning leaves isn't the most natural thing in the world.
Tell us about the first time. Where, when, and who were you trying to show off to?
Or, if you've never tried a cigarette, tell us something interesting on the subject of smoking.
Personally, I've never ever smoked a cigarette. Lung damage from pneumonia put me off.
(
chthonic, Wed 19 Mar 2008, 18:49)
« Go Back
Carrot spliffMy head of year used to tell the following story in assemblies about peer pressure and I'm sure she won't mind me reproducing it here, especially if any young impressionable b3tards are reading.
She was a teenager in the 60s, the era of free love, mini skirts and drugs. All of her friends smoked anything going and were constantly trying to get her to partake of various naughty substances. However, she was and always had been completely disgusted by smoking. There was no way she was ever going to smoke anything no matter how high it might get her, and that was that. But there was still the problem of what to do about her friends, who were rapidly losing patience with her boring, non-smoking ways. Did she find new friends? Of course not! She did what any sensible person would do in that situation. She made a carrot spliff.
Ingredients:
1 carrot
1 enormous rizla
Method:
1. Grate the carrot
2. Put the grated carrot under the grill until it turns brown and starts to resemble something that might conceivably get you high
3. Roll the biggest spliff the world has ever seen
You now have yourself a healthy, 100% organic fatty boombatty that, far from destroying your lungs, will help you see in the dark. Honest.
She took her carrot spliff to a festival she was attending with her cool, drug-taking friends. She picked her moment carefully, waiting until everyone was watching before she pulled this enormous joint out of her bag. They were all massively impressed. She lit the end, which immediately began spewing forth vile black smoke, but this did not deter her from attempting to take a drag. Her violent coughing, spluttering and vomiting was upstaged only by the hysterical laughter of her companions.
You can't get high on grilled grated carrot.
Mrs Becker, if you're reading this, I'm 25 now and have still never smoked!
(, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 13:54, 1 reply)
that's weirdIf you microwave a raw carrot for long enough, eventually it will resemble a lovely fat brown cigar.
(, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 14:40, closed)
« Go Back