Sub (unused)
Remember the advert from a few years back about how you always remember a certain teacher from primary school?

---wavy lines---

May 1976. The football team from my primary school, which had only been founded a few years earlier, had made it to the borough cup final against the team that had won it every year in living memory. Which wasn't that long to be honest. We were 11 after all.

Now, I wasn't in the first team for football, but I did captain the second team. And so it was that I found myself named substitute for the final, held at a neutral school somewhere in the depths of the borough.

While we may have been young, we knew no-one gave us a chance of beating the other team, and the giants versus minnows aspect was reinforced by the fact that the other team wore all white, while we wore red and white striped shirts, black shorts and red socks.

Football fans amongst you may already have made the Leeds vs Sunderland connection. Except while Sunderland won 1-0 thanks to an Ian Porterfield goal and great saves at the other end from Jim Montgomery, our mini version of that cup final was never a close contest. We wiped the floor with our supposed betters.

With ten minutes left, we were 5-1 up. There was no way we were going to lose. It was exhilarating to be part of it. Except I wasn't. I was stuck on the sidelines watching, waiting for the teacher who ran the school side to decide that with the clock ticking down, it might a idea to give the substitute a few minutes on the pitch to enjoy being part of the day.

True, I got a medal, as did everyone else, but I felt a fraud in assembly the next morning when we were all up on stage, knowing that I hadn't played any part in the match whasoever.

So, Mr Adams of Southlake County Primary School, 1976, it may be getting on for four decades later, but I remember you alright. Not even five minutes, you fucking bastard.
(Capo, Sun 22 Apr 2012, 21:25, 3 replies)

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( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sun 22 Apr 2012, 21:31, closed)

Ha'way the lads

( e.m.m.y. foxtrot uniform charlie kilo india tango, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 11:16, closed)

Similar thing happened to me.
I started in the team, we made it to the semi final, and I was on the bench, I got 10 minutes, then in the final I was an unused sub.

In the next bit, regional, as opposed to county, I wasn't even selected.

I don't know what I had done wrong, but I got a rather pointless "winners" medal.
(The Kwyjibo A big, dumb, balding North American ape., Mon 23 Apr 2012, 12:09, closed)