wanking parrot
Like many of these stories, it's one that starts in a pub.
A bunch of office colleagues are chatting over Friday evening pints. Most are white-collar types, but also there is Reg, the slightly doddery, good-hearted but rather dim caretaker from the office.
One of the chaps was talking about his pet parrot. "I call him Onan," he says, "because he's always spilling is seed!"
Much guffawing ensues. All except Reg, who is looking a bit puzzled and clearly doesn't get it. "Whassat? I don't get that one."
The chap explains. "It's a biblical reference. You know, Onan, from the bible? It's to do with masturbation. Spilling seed, you see? Onanism, it's where we get the word from. Basically I'm saying he spills his seed, or is always wanking, if you prefer."
"Ah, right, I geddit!" And Reg creases up and laughs his head off, almost having a heart attack right there, such was his amusement.
Back at work on Monday, Reg was in the canteen, and wanted to tell some others about this brilliantly-named parrot.
"You'll never guess what he calls his parrot!" Reg says to his assembled audience, already creasing up again and barely able to get the words out due to extreme mirth.
"He's calls him Wanker, because he's always dropping his food! Hahahahaha"
( Biffins Bridge, Fri 19 Mar 2010, 12:11, Reply)