Well, that taught 'emSammi Evil Nice writes "I shared with two students, and it was always the same; whenever it was near to paytime, my milk *and only this* would disappear.
One of them, John, was a lovely bloke but allergic to nuts. John makes tea. Soon after, John starts swelling up.
ME: Runs, administers epi-pen. "You're going into anaphalactic shock."
HIM: "How do you know?"
ME: "I put almond oil in my milk."
What have you done to teach somebody a lesson?
(, Thu 26 Apr 2007, 14:54)
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Another dull crap flatmate taleBack at uni, 4 of us decided to share a flat during our second year. One of the 4 we shall call Barry. He was a fat, unhygienic cretin, with few redeeming qualities other than he had a car which was very handy. For the old Viz readers out there, he looked like Felix from Felix And His Amazing Underpants, but when he spoke it was more like Roger Irrelevant.
Sadly Barry had some very dubious friends - friends that grunted rather than spoke, turned the place into a squat, stored all kinds of frankly weird shit in the flat, and pinched our food and clothes when we weren't there.
Our relationship with him quickly deterioated.
Barry shared a room with a mate of ours, who's life was made miserable by Barry and his pals. His stuff went missing or was moved on a daily basis. They talked about stabbing him while he was pretending to be asleep. They put drawing pins around his bed so that he would step on them when he got up. Childish stuff really, but it eventually came to a head and we told him to pack his shit and get the hell out.
He left immediately, telling all our mutual friends, coursemates etc, that he was delighted to leave at the drop of a hat because we would be liable for his share of the rent for the remainder of the year as "there's no way they'll get anyone to move in with them for 3 months".
Wrong Barry. You moved out, we fumigated your stinking boudoir, and another mate moved in that afternoon. Get it right up you.
(, Mon 30 Apr 2007, 11:32, Reply)
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