the usual "at school" story
back in the day, 8 or 9 years ago (christ i'm getting old) there was the generic 'cock of the year', which was the hardest guy in your year, although in hindsight i think it has two meanings.

Anyway, school finishes, gates open, everyone floods out, usuall banter outside gates before everyone says their farewells (and buys and icecream from the peadeo in a van).

out strides the cock of the year, blonde hair, blue eyes, and his usuall chav crowd in tow.

he goes round, mocking, 'playfully' punching people in the stomach as he walks by. it comes to my turn, i knew what was coming so jumped out of the way, but he still clipped me in the stomach but not enough to hurt. not wanting to appear too hard, in case tries again, and being the little geek i was trying to avoid confrontation, i bent over and pretended it hurt.

usual series of thoughts running through my head; "stay in this position until he's gone, don't make eye contact, UPPERCUT THE FUCKER"

Shit, what, where did that thought come from? too late. i'd looked up, targeted his chin, straightened up whist swinging my fist and.... oh shit, contact.


FUCK FUCK FUCK. RUN? STAY AND PRETEND I'M HARD. FREEZE LIKE A CHICKEN? oh, yeah, right, now i'm a chicken. thoguth the haze of my own confusion and his, i hear his chav 'posse' shout out "hit him back, you can't let him do that to you, get him" etc. "oh dear. i'm going to be on the floor" i thought.



"nah, err, i'll leave him this time" replied a squeeky voice.


what. the. fuck?

i walked home, feeling heroic and making a permanent mental note never to do any shit like that again.



he never even looked at me again.




sorry for length, girth, and excessive use of commas.
( Snorty McBumhole YouTube.com/MinistryOfGeeks, Tue 1 May 2007, 1:11, Reply)