My First Job
Was a summer job for 6 weeks (in between 1st and 2nd years A-Levels).

I worked in a large department store on the furniture department. After an unsuccessful stint in sales (too honest to the customers), a woeful attempt at delivery (put holes in the walls of a newly built house with the wardrobes we were delivering) and a highly suspect few days working in the offices, I ended up as a warehouse monkey looking after the receipt of furniture. This was OK except that the boss was an alcoholic who was totally unpredictable. He was known to attack warehouse staff with whatever implement was handiest, normally a hammer or a crowbar. The other staff had decided that it was my turn to suffer the wrath which would be visited upon the bearer of bad-tidings, namely that an entire shipment of leather furniture had been treated a wee bit roughly. To be honest the whole lot were scratched to fuck. It was therefore with great trepidation that I approached his office with the latest bad news.

I shook my way into his office and blurted the whole lot out in one sentence. “thefurnituresknacked.Allthesetteesarescratchedandsoarethechairsandthepouffeethings.” I shut my eyes and waited. Only for the mad Irish git to say “Here take this.” I opened one eye and spotted the tenner held out. As I took it he said “Get me a bottle of vodka and two of the big packets of felt tip pens from Woollies.”

My job for the rest of the afternoon was to drink vodka with the Irish Loony and colour in the scratches. Surreal to say the least.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 14:03, 3 replies)

Ha!
Great post! *click*
( SpankyHanky, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 14:26, closed)

I might suggest a new QOTW
Has too much honesty got you into trouble? Could be fun.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 18 Jun 2009, 14:51, closed)

I'd post in that.
My younger days were plagued by a massive lack of tact.
(Scritty Bakerman., Sun 21 Jun 2009, 6:43, closed)