Red mist over a tea cup
Rewind back to me being 17, and working in an office run by a woman who was a complete control freak and permanent whinge arse, and was a sort of English "Mrs Doyle" lookalikey.

One of my duties in the morning was to make the old hag a cup of tea. Tea making facilities (no kettles allowed in offices) were a floor above, with a sink and a geyser on the wall in a little room next to the gents.

Anyway, this particular morning, I had forgotten to take her teacup up, so she got her tea in a radio station's promotional mug.

I brought it down to her, she had a sip, then dressed me down in front of the whole office for ruining her tannin experience by not presenting her with her usual "china" teacup. (Incidently, the china mug would not feature on antiques roadshow - all the office teacups had been stolen from a local hospital!)

My job was up for review, and I needed the cash, so I had to take it on the chin. But her petty ramblings made me boil and seethe, and the fact that I was taking it made me feel like the said school boy.

So I was sent upstairs to correct the matter. I couldn't resist a stop by the gents to piss in her china teacup, before transferring radio mug tea into urine residue.

I took it downstairs, gave it to her. She sipped it, and remarked how better it tasted, while I had to stand in front of her and wait for her approval.

Everyone said they knew what I had done by the smile on my face when I returned.

Glad she liked drinking from the yellow fountain of youth!

Length: 32 steps and a 20 yard corrider to the tea room.
( Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Fri 21 Sep 2007, 9:36, Reply)