Being told off as an adultWhen was the last time you were properly told off? You know: treated as an errant child rather than the sophisticated adult you are.
The sort of thing that dredges up an involuntary teenage mumble of "Sorry, Miss" whilst you stare at the ground.
Go on, tell us what childish thing you were up to when you got caught.
Oh, and can we have more than one-line answers this time? Cheers!
(
chthonic, Thu 20 Sep 2007, 17:18)
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Liverpool airportDon't get me wrong, I'm an ardent fan of the North, but fuck me stereotypes leap out and twat you round the head at Liverpool airport.
They’ve recently introduced this scam where they took out the round and round and round we go queuing system for security checks and put up 'queue from here 15mins' type notices, with and option to pay £2 to jump it. It's that sort of place.
Their "International Arrivals" hall is one of the least auspicious places I've ever arrived, it's like turning up in the stair well of a multi-story car park (really - it's a small door and some bad concrete screed and railings, then a snaky queue through to the mephitic, malodorous stench of fear and reprisal in immigration).
Whoever designed it had no civic pride and an eye for a bargain.
By a sedimentary process, the staff there are well, bottom feeders. The brawn of bouncers but the intellect of NCP car park attendants. Grim.
We wanted to bring a coffee machine out in hand luggage, £20 on ebay, job and knock. Weight, 9kg. Size, comfortable in an overhead locker.
Profile on X-Ray (or whatever it is that makes everything apart from metal go a funny shade of Tango or snot) LOOKS LIKE A FUCKING TRIDENT MISSILE (apparently).
Hauled out of the queue by Gorilla.
"You can't bring that through it's too heavy."
"No, it's 9kg, we weighed it."
"No, it's too heavy. You can't bring it through, it might hit someone on the head'"
[thinks - shit - 5.30am is not the time to start exploring the subtle differences between weight and density, 'prithee, which is heaviest, a kilo of lead or a kilo of feathers' etc - we'd get killed]
Mrs Slicker adopts wobbly toned empassioned plea girly voice - "please we've bought it all the way here (obviously) we're no bother etc etc."
"Very well. (how magnaminous). But I don't EVER want to see you bringing one of those through here again, DO YOU UNDERSTAND."
Fuck. That's our import-export business stymied then.
(, Fri 21 Sep 2007, 15:57, Reply)
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