I can never forget

It was a hot and humid day in August 2003. I was travelling to work without a care in the world. To get to work I had to walk along King Street in Hammersmith - a most unpleasant street frequented by drunks and chavs.

As I was strolling along, idly daydreaming, I became suddenly aware of a terrible odour. The smell was a combination of piss, shit and vomit with the unmistakable overtones of Tenants super strength.

Looking around me to discover the source of this most obnoxious smell, my eyes fell open a woman. She was probably in her 50s and has obviously been living on the street for around 49 years. She was dressed in rags that were caked in what was undoubtedly excrement.

Catching my eye she smiled, and then did something that will haunt my dreams the rest of my years. Still holding my gaze she crouched down and gathered her skirt in her hands.

She then let forth a torrent of piss - a gushing stream of urine like a horse on diuretics splashed on the pavement - all flowing from her vagina, her shit smeared vagina that resembled a dirty, badly plucked chicken that had been attacked by an axe. And all the time she held my eye and carried on smiling.

After what felt like an eternity I managed to drag my eyes away from this living nightmare and ran away.

When I got to work I had a wank in the toilets, obviously.
(MrHungry, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:09, 1 reply)

Ha-ha!
Click for ending with an adverb!
(SonoraAeroClub "OH SWEET HELEN OF BALLS!", Fri 29 May 2009, 11:16, closed)