When I was..
Working as a barkeep for the local Tavern, not so very long ago, one poor bloke had a few too many. This was not a rare occurence, he was well known for liking a drink, and then as we closed up the pub, me and Dave (head barman) noticed him passed out on the floor leaning on the outside wall of the pub. Since I knew where they guy lived I said I'd take him home, so me, Dave and a leftover bouncer loaded him into my car, which was a brand spanking new 1.2 Fiat Punto, in a nice shade of red.
We'd got halfway back to his house before he woke up and looked at me in the way a cow looks at an oncoming train, before arching his head back and chucking all over my dashboard. This displeased me, so I duly pulled over and kicked the pissed bastard out of the car.
As much as I'd have loved to beat the living daylights out of him, they'd already been vomited out of him and he was by now quite unconcious. It was at this point that things got really silly. It just so happened that a couple walked by while I was trying to wake him up, and then a fire engine turned up. With the couple shouting at me to ring and ambulance, me trying to make sure he didn't choke on his own vomit and the firemen trying to get sense out of anyone, I got a bit confused.
Then, before anything else could happen, an ambulance showed up, summoned by some unseen force. They loaded our man into the back and carted him off. At that point I asked the firemen if they had some water and a cloth handy, and so it came to be that me and 2 firemen spent 15 minutes cleaning out my car at 2 O'clock on a Wednesday morning.
To this day, our drunken friend still doesn't know how he ended up in the hospital that night, and I still haven't quite got rid of the stain on my mats.
(BassNinja, Tue 24 Aug 2004, 12:17, Reply)