My Worst VomitWe all love a drink. Some of us love them so much they want to see them again on the way out of their mouths. I once got caught by surprise by the boozy sickness while chatting to some friends in my kitchen. Quick as a flash I grabbed a nearby pan and chundered away merrily in it. Realising it was probably time for bed I staggered off to my room. Unfortunately, my co-ordination failed just as I reached the landing and I somersaulted down the entire flight of stairs with my saucepan full of vomit. Beat that!
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chthonic, Thu 19 Aug 2004, 21:00)
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xc racinga while ago (well, last year to be precise) i decided to do a few xc races on my bike.. the first few went fine, leaving just the last 'official' race, and a 24 hour affair (much in the style on le'mans, a relay of 4 people partaking).
anyways, the morning of the penaultimate race, i decide to have a tin or 2 cos im hungover. start the race. unfortunatly descover that fizzy beer downed quickly + lots of bumps is a bad combo. stop and chunder. its a really really hot day, so i start drinking lots from my camelback (kinda a rucksack with a bad full of water in, and a hose to your mouth, gives you a back, like a camel. haha). its got a 3 litre capacity, so i drink a load thinking im fine for the race. chunder again. get on my bike and start riding, take a drink and a minute later feel the need. cant be arsed to stop this time, so chunder over my shoulder, only to hear the puke reply 'oi!'. look round to discover not my puke, but one of my 'team' for the 24 hour race, with a puke covered front wheel. snigger and carry on going, with a general cycle of drink, wait a min, puke. now xc races have 'technical' sections in, which often feature 'chicken runs' to allow riders to take a slower, but easier line round, if they're not feeling overly confident. i decide that puking on each of these is a good idea, as if xc riders cant ride tricky sections, they deserve to ride thru my puke. get completely dehydrated and finish the race in a miserable position..
forward a month or so, and i'm at the 24 hour race, which features a short road section. drink a few more tins (i dont learn quickly), and manage to chunder a nice long line of spag bol on the road section.. whilst going about 20 mph. leave a 30yrd long trail of tomatospew in my trail, and handover to my mate, who comes back off his lap and simply says 'told you that beer was a bad idea'. smartarse. the vom lasted the remaining 19 hours, and as far as i know may still be there to this day.
sorry for the incredible unfunnyness, but fellow bikers out there might find it mildly amusing. the length:girth ratio of this post is incredably worrying when viewed fullscreen @ 2048 res...
(, Tue 24 Aug 2004, 16:55, Reply)
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