Oh, so many!
Let's see now, we had:

Mr "Tosser" Taylor, physics. Good teacher but he was the spitting image of Yoffy (sp) from Fingerbobs. Played the banjo. In class.

Mr "Jim Skull" Currie, chemistry. Another good teacher, but with a predilection for explosions. He used to get us all to sit round the benches at the edge of the classroom, with the windows open, and set off balloons full of hydrogen/oxygen mixtures. The resulting explosions used to get all of the teachers down the corridor looking out of their classrooms wondering what the hell the bang was.

Mr Henderson, French. Lecherous, tall, dark, late 30s when I was taught by him, who later married one of his pupils (who of course was about 25 years his junior) once she left the school. As far as I know, they're still together. Dirty, filthy, lucky bastard.

Mr E Sharp, music. Nothing remarkable, just a good name for a music teacher.

Mr "Bamber Gascoigne" McLachlan, maths. Once went out of his classroom for a bit, whereupon student horseplay resulted in one bloke being shut in the cupboard. "Hey lads, there's porn in here!" he shouted. Of course, no-one believed him, thinking it was just a ruse to get out of the cupboard. But he shoved several examples out under the door, so he was released and said porn was spread all over Bamber's desk, and the class returned to a state of impeccable behaviour awaiting his return. To his credit, Bamber merely placed his briefcase on the desk on his return, and got on with the lesson. But I think there was some official reprimand later on.

And finally:

Mr Innes, maths. Known as FBI (Fat Bob Innes). Completely eccentric. Used to intersperse his lessons with anecdotes about how when he died he would add himself to the food chain, as his ashes from cremation would drift over to the nearby hill, and be deposited by rainfall onto the grass, which would then be eaten by sheep, which in turn would end up on our dinner plates. In fact. if he's dead by now, I may indeed have eaten part of him! Perish the thought. He also had one of my mates, Steve, sprinting up the middle of the classroom, when he was teaching him to run properly. I would have thought this would be a job for a PE teacher rather than an ageing, overweight mathematician, but there you are.

More later, if I think of some.

I have not changed any names to protect the innocent. Because they weren't innocent.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 10 Nov 2005, 9:35, Reply)