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This is a question Why should you be fired from your job?

I spent three years "working" in the Ministry of Agriculture carefully crafting projectiles out of folded paper and drawing pins that I would then fire at colleagues with an elastic band. On discovering I'd been conducting all-out warfare when I should really have been in a field counting cows, I was asked to "reconsider my career options" outside the service.

Why, then, should you be fired from your job?

(, Thu 9 Aug 2007, 13:04)
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Cash
My company is essentially a payroll bureau. We pay about 80,000 people every week. It's all run from a mainframe. I'm the last, and only person who knows how it works. Intimately.

I can do anything I want on it. For example, I can pay some contractors who mysteriously only ever work 1 week in 20. They do a lot of hours that week and get a lot of overtime. We pay them about £89 an hour. We charge the very very big clients about £119 an hour. I can pay the contractors with cheques - unforunately they move around a lot, so they have a few PO Boxes in really small Post Offices where there is no cctv.

The big clients query these contractor payments occasionally, but they have thousands of queries all the time, they get misplaced. After a while, they end up in a big pot with other missing transactions.

Sometimes, some of my brother's, lets say, less well to do friends, have bank accounts they dont use much. Thats always handy.

Sometimes i go on holiday for quite a long time.

But to cut a long story short, I nick the tea bags.
(, Thu 9 Aug 2007, 15:13, Reply)

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