I've been dying to post this,
This is genuine correspondence from an unsuccessful job applicant. It's only slightly relevant, but I love it!

Dear xxxxx,

Thank you for your reply to my application. I notice that although the email was sent to my address, the letter began 'Dear Trevor'. Is this because 'Trevor' was due to get the rejection letter and I was to get the invitation to an interview, and by some terrible administrative error the messages have been sent to the wrong people?

Perhaps, even now, 'Trevor' is mentally preparing himself for the job interview that should, by right, have been mine. Imagine his distress when he turns up at your offices only to find his name is not on the interview list, it could undermine his confidence for life.

Of course, I realise this is no fault of yours, you give a minion a job to do and they mess it up. I know how you feel, in future you need to be strict, xxxxxxx, very strict.

Anyway, nil desperandum, I'm available for interview all next week, but if I don't hear from you before Friday I may seriously have to consider whether xxxxxxxxx and I have a future together.

Pax vobiscum,

Peter

On 24 Jan 2007, at 11:22, xxxxxxxxxx wrote:

Dear Trevor

Thank you for your recent application for the position of xxxxxxxxxxx with xxxxxxxxxxxx. Unfortunately on this occasion your application has been unsuccessful. We would however be happy to keep your details on file, should any other suitable positions arise.

May we take this opportunity to thank you for your interest in xxxxxxxxxx and wish you every success in your search for new employment.

Yours Sincerely


xxxxxxxxxx
HR Manager
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Thu 9 Aug 2007, 15:20, Reply)