Why should you be fired from your job?I spent three years "working" in the Ministry of Agriculture carefully crafting projectiles out of folded paper and drawing pins that I would then fire at colleagues with an elastic band. On discovering I'd been conducting all-out warfare when I should really have been in a field counting cows, I was asked to "reconsider my career options" outside the service.
Why, then, should you be fired from your job?
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 9 Aug 2007, 13:04)
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KFC! Freezers! TheftThe only time (well, one of the only times) I've actualy been fired was my dramatic exit from KFC.I used to work in a walk-in KFC on a very busy student drinking road, so business was always pretty hectic.
When I joined the team I was inerviewed by Martin. The only question was "Do you like boxing?" I said yes, and gained a job on the counter.
We were a merry band; Danny and I formed a strong alliance, and were guilty of cleaning up naked and leaving the cctv to be viewed by senior management, theft of food and general misbehaviour. Martin was our mate and gave us a lot of leeway. Then the money from the safe vanished. Martin was dismissed and Danny and I were nicked then released.
Martin's replacement was Gemma. A bitch of the highest order. She was 25, and it had taken her 9 years to reach the dizzying heights of temporary small branch manager.
She refused to allow staff nice bits of chicken in their meals (we ignored her) and generally made life unpleasant. She was out of her depth, and despite loathing her I once volunteered to do her a favour and worked a double shift to cover her poor rota skills. Ahe was weeping, and what else could I do?
She made my life hell afterwards so Danny and I launched a sustained campaign against her. At KFC there are, of necessity, very cold walk in freezers. We soaked then froze her street clothes, putting each item, and each key, and each credit card into the bottom of a box of fries. Then we soaked her.
She was ill for some time.
The campaign continued, and eventually the crunch came and I was asked to leave, after I had threatened to cut Bharat C Patel, the owner, into little pieces. As I left I threw her hat into the frier. I also superglued her car door locks shut as I left the building.
The beauty was that as a student I was perpetually skint. In the weeks before my dismissal I had stolen 50 kilos of special breading, and many boxes of fillets and other items.
And to top it off the other guys that hadn't been fired continued to cook up a full rack of chicken (28 pieces or so), beans, chips and gravy before coming round mine after closing for a beer, smoke and go on the playstation.
Happy days
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disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 10 Aug 2007, 14:42,
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