Perhaps not the worse, but definitely the weirdest....
I'm quite a normal bloke when it comes to the naughties, and thought that as I reached my (cough) mid-30s I'd probably seen and done all that I ever would do.

Wrong.

Away on my team's annual trip to Lancashire last year, me and my room-mate copped off with a couple of ladies from the local boozer.

Incidentally, mine was an absolute corker - only 19 years old, with pneumatic breasts and a washboard stomach. A first year law student no less. Crikey!

We invite the girls back to our hotel room for 'drinks'. Upon arrival, my one wastes no time and promptly strips off and climbs into my bed. Slightly stunned, I follow suit - leaving my mate and his lady somewhat lost for words. They eventually strip off and climb into his bed, which is just 18 inches from my own.

The lights go off, nature takes its course, and we start to get down to business. However, the sound of my mate porking his (somewhat overweight) bedfellow was frankly putting me off my stroke. Try as I might (admittedly alcohol had probably also played a part) I just couldn't get the Little General to stand to attention.

Being the gentleman that I am (my mother would be so proud) I proceeded to satisfy my partner using a variety of methods, before we fall asleep.

Waking up the following morning, assuming that the evening's events were nothing more than a magnificent dream, I realised that it was all very very real. Now with the General fully up and saluting, and wishing to make amends for my previous failure, I grabbed my lady and dragged her off to the bathroom where I made up for lost time over the sink.

We return to Lancs in August. Click on 'I like this' if I should request a single room this time!
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 15 Jun 2007, 15:35, Reply)