comic relief
When I was a young lad of sixteen or so, me and my first Girlfriend proper, used to sneak over the local school playing fields for our frequent adventures in drunken sexual discovery.
One dark evening I pulled down her M&S panties, exposed her heaving snatch and thought it was probably about time I should
venture down for a munch on that (still technically illegal) hairy clopper.

First impressions weren't great - It was slimy, not entirely unlike a 'Scampi Fry' and had a distinctly metallic aftertaste.
'Strange' I thought, so gave her a couple more victory laps then carried on pumping away unexpertly until my toes curled.

3 minutes later:

"That was great" I said, and pulled up my trousers while swigging away on a party pack of White Lightning feeling like a thinner, paler Barry White.
We went and joined our group of friends elsewhere who immediately began laughing and calling me Rudolph due to the fact my nose was covered in her menstrual blood.

Thanks for telling me love...

Revenge, I can assure you, was sweet, degrading and painful.
(wrigglesworth, Tue 19 Jun 2007, 15:14, Reply)