Not really an answer to THE question...
...but an answer to some of the questions that have been posted in answer to the question:


Hemorrhoids.
Intense itching in public. What is the etiquette regarding this?

Buy some cream, it soothes and stops itching. If you're embarrassed to buy it, find a branch of Tesco with self-service checkouts and go at about 3am.

My problem...
Should I spend all of my student loan on DVDs? (Probably a bit late now)

Of course not. You should save at least half of it for BEER

Do some work,
or lurk on b3ta all day?

You have answered your own question here. You do some work, and lurk on b3ta all day, i.e. have your browser open but minimised and read throughout the day, only posting messages occasionally

hmmm
To Revise or not to revise....hmmmmm

It's been scientifically proved (by Scientists and all that), that by NOT revising you do better in exams. The science bit says that those who DO revise, only remember the bits they have revised on

Have a wank now (guaranteed obviously)
or save it for the possibility of a shag later?

It's a tough one, you can always do both but then you won't enjoy the shag as much...

Have the wank now, and enjoy yourself. Later on, if you don't get the shag, you'll be glad you had the wank. Of course if you do get a shag LATER, you will last longer and therefore give your partner more pleasure, therefore increasing your chances of a) a blow job next time, and b) there BEING a next time.

I like horses, best of all the animals.
But I also like custard, best of all the warm yellow stuff for putting on puddings.

What should I do?

Book yourself a ticket to France, where they EAT horse meat. Complain loudly in English about how cruel it is, then eat some custard that you made earlier. Custard in French is "Sauce Angliase" or "English Sauce". 100% of fact.

I promise next time I will post my own REAL answer to the question, in other words a QUESTION...
( Amos E Wolfe makes vinyl signs and things like that, Wed 19 May 2004, 19:57, Reply)