b3ta.com user Manofmilk
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Bah - my one frontpage no longer hosted.

I have nothing else to say.

Recent front page messages:

He fought bravely in the war...

...but he's still an ugly mutha
(Wed 18th Jun 2003, 14:55, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Join us... come join the cult

I never joined a cult..
..but at Lancaster Uni were tried to create our own. It started when we were bored one day and said "yes please" when the 'elders' from the church of later day saints (Mormons) asked if they could have a chat. Long story short we received our very own copy of the book or Mormon (cleverly title 'another testament of Jesus Christ').
The idea really happened when the next day some bog-standard Christians called round. After a long chat and discussion we managed to swap our Mormon book for a new testament and the following day repeat the exercise with our shiny new testament, the book of Jehovah and some witnesses!
This was the inspiration we needed: convinced the solution to religious conflict was to unify all the many faiths we continued to swap the various books from visitors at out door, eventually managing to trade nearly every major religious text for another one. Ultimately our quest to get them all to read each others books and agree a common ground failed because we were just too lazy to do any more than answer our door and argue when diagnosis murder wasn't on the tv...

No apologies for the lack of apology concerning length or girth...
(Fri 27th Jan 2006, 14:50, More)

» Your Revenge Stories

Signed an ex-mate upto several 'horny housewives' type porn mags...
...and had them delivered under his name to his fiances flat.
(Fri 14th May 2004, 1:08, More)

» Jobsworths

Safeway Zombie...
...at the till refused to serve me a packet of Nurofen with a bottle of cought syrup and some beechams powder at the same time. The reason beign of course that I could overdose on afforementioned. Attempting to explain that only one product actually contained paracetamol only caused to twunt to call security gaurd over! I then was forced to purchase the pills from one till, walk back around and buy the cought syrup from another and then treck back around and purchase the Beechams from a third till. Following much complainig to the manager and general kicking up of a stink I got all three products for free and enjoyed coming across said Moron scrubbing the toilets a week later :D

Complaints regarding length and/or girth in writing to the usual address.
(Sat 14th May 2005, 10:54, More)

» The last thing that made me cry

Just the other day...
...when I found out there was no newsletter this week!
(Fri 15th Apr 2005, 21:40, More)

» Booze Related Disasters

Once my mate abd I were so drunk...
...that he didn't notice that he had missed the ash tray and stubbed his cigar out on my hand, right between my 1st two fingers. I didn't notice either untill the morning, when I woke in angony with a perfectly circular section of flesh between my fingers completly burnt away. Because all the skin was burnt of it took a very looooong time to heal and caused me considerable pain for weeks.
(Fri 19th Mar 2004, 7:32, More)
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