b3ta.com user The Duke of Prunes
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EMAIL: [email protected]

The first ever Beattie post

Dick Beattie lives here, visit it

Useful Beattie Links








one second encounter Three Four fivest sixthst Seventhst

ate nineth Tenst eleventeen Babs and Beattie thirteen

Fourteen twentyfifteen sistine sebenteen ayteen Ninetea
the twentea twenteawan Twennytoo

My invite to Beatties Box Social

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Recent front page messages:

Ken Bruce...

(Thu 1st Apr 2010, 11:48, More)

This is the neeeyooos...

(Wed 17th Jan 2007, 21:08, More)


(Thu 16th Nov 2006, 17:35, More)

Cheeky wee bugger!

(Thu 9th Feb 2006, 22:13, More)

I wish I was a dog

(Tue 20th Dec 2005, 19:02, More)


Hey, everyone! free ham and broth!
(Tue 22nd Nov 2005, 14:36, More)


(Sat 19th Nov 2005, 18:13, More)


changed slightly from last night

Credit to Aphex for the Dover Sole and N8ive for the pussy
(Fri 21st Oct 2005, 9:42, More)

Nice eyebrows

Free sweeties, kids!

(Thu 20th Oct 2005, 21:21, More)

Well! well! well!

(Wed 28th Sep 2005, 21:55, More)

Better out than in

(Thu 8th Sep 2005, 19:24, More)

Tunnocks! Tunnocks! Tunnocks!

My tripe

(Tue 9th Aug 2005, 22:32, More)

It just won't shut up

"blah, blah, blah..."
Site of prunes
(Thu 2nd Jun 2005, 21:38, More)

*double thumbs up*

(Wed 18th May 2005, 19:58, More)

Granny made sausage rolls especially for you

go on eat up! some are vegetarian too, well that's what granny says.

Prunes, it's full of guff
(Tue 19th Apr 2005, 23:04, More)

A wee bugger

(Sun 17th Apr 2005, 22:11, More)

Pwaaaaaap! Pwaaaaarp!

my site of guff

(Thu 10th Mar 2005, 19:24, More)

Yesterday Wogan played with his can phones

The mighty Wogan series
I finally got some decent webspace, pops ups are now gone
(Thu 24th Feb 2005, 21:08, More)


(Wed 9th Feb 2005, 22:39, More)

Super! have this roast

(Sat 1st Jan 2005, 20:54, More)

hahaha, the beautiful lady likes that

(Tue 30th Nov 2004, 10:47, More)

A stoat smoking a pipe and wearing a bowler hat and a bow tie

he's carrying an umbrella incase it rains
(Wed 27th Oct 2004, 23:03, More)

Benny Loggins

(Fri 30th Apr 2004, 15:47, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Bastard Colleagues

Clicky pen
He has a clicky pen and sits all day clicking his clicky fucking pen. "Click, click, click, clicketty clicky, click, click...clickclickclickclickclickclick. Clicky click, clickclickclickclick....clickety click...." and on it goes, on and on and on, sitting there clicking his pen, clicking away.

When he is telling a hilarious story about his X-Box or latest graphics card the clicking of his pen gets faster. When he's trying to explain something to someone he clicks his pen slowly. When he walks he clicksd his pen in time with with footsteps. "Click, click, click, click, click, clicketty, fucking click." All bloody day. I've even started hiding his pens by throwing them out the window on to the roof, but some how he always manages to find a new clicky pen.
(Thu 24th Jan 2008, 13:17, More)

» Petty Sabotage

I once replaced my friend's mouthwash with sulphuric acid,
what a laugh that was.
(Wed 4th May 2005, 11:15, More)

» Claims to Fame

I'm responible for making Coco Pops more chocolatey
in about 1987 I wrote to Kelloggs complaining that my seven year old child (I don't have any kids) was very upset because the coco pops never turned his milk chocolatey. I ended up sending an box of old coco pops back to them and after several months of correspondence and Kelloggs 'perfroming tests', they allegedly made Coco Pops something like 5% more chocolatey and I got ten pounds worth of vouchers.
(Thu 24th Feb 2005, 14:44, More)

» My Arch-nemesis

The other X reg Laguna driver
My one is blue and his one is red and I see him driving about everyday.

Sometimes he parks down in my favourite space at the beach during lunch times and there was another time I saw him parking in my favourite disabled parking space in Morrisons car park.

Last Tuesday I saw him on the dual carriageway so I overtook him, he'll think twice about driving in front of me again. How I hate him.
(Fri 30th Apr 2010, 12:19, More)

» Annoying words and phrases

Waiters and waitress...
Hey Guys
What can I do you for guys?
Table for two? certainly guys.
What would you like to drink guys? May I recommend the Merlot Savginon.
Real ales?? Well guys, we have Deuchars ale, its a real creamy, dark sweet ale.

Here are your drinks guys?
Are you ready to order yet guys?
Kippers and cheese tart? Good choice, good choice.

Any starders guys?
No starders? No sweat guys.

Here are your meals guys, just let me know if you need anything else guys. ENJOY!

Hey guys are you finished? Was everything fine for you guys?

Can I tempt you with our sweets guys?
No? No sweat guys.

The bill? Sure thing guys, sure thing.

I hope everything was sadifagtory for you guys. Catch you layder guys.

[No tip for that fud.]
(Fri 9th Apr 2010, 9:52, More)
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