b3ta.com user emmalina
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I forgot what I was just going to writes.

So I will just sit here staring at endless amounts of teh crazy picture.

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Best answers to questions:

» Crazy Relatives

My dad...
...decided the other day that the best way to destroy an out of date credit card was not the obvious way.

Most people chop them up with scissors.

Not my dad, he decided to melt it in the microwave. Having forgotten there was some metal on there.

Cue one massive explosion and a new microwave, he insists that it would have been ok. He just thinks he left it on too long.
(Fri 6th Jul 2007, 16:25, More)

» In the Army Now - The joy of the Armed Forces

My Great Grandad was in WWI
He got shot in the head at 18 and proceeded to get discharged with a metal plate in his head!

He was told he would only have 5 years to live and was offered a one off compensation payment or a stonkin pension for every year of his life.

He chose the pension, and proceeded to live well into his 90's. Ha! :)
(Sat 25th Mar 2006, 10:04, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

Sitting in the canteen this lunchtime...listning to my fellow coworkers moaning on about their kids (and having spent the morning reading all these quality jokes)...

Them : "When people come over to stay, I always make sure the kids are tucked up in bed."

Me: "..."

Them : "And if anyone stays over, I make sure they make no noise in the night."

Me: " How do you do that, with a pillow or a a baseball bat?"

Them: ...eerie silence

Me: "I'll be off back to my desk then..."

Them: "Yes, I think you should."

Miserable bastards.
(Mon 13th Sep 2004, 13:57, More)

» Cross Dressing

I used to go out with a guy...
He lived over 300 miles away, and when I first travelled down to meet him, one of the first things he confessed was his love of ladies clothing. More presisely his love of wearing ladies clothing.

In the bedroom.

I had to go back home the next day, but it was a rather eventful evening. With his mum and dad in the next room and him wearing a get up that would have made Dame Edna blush.

Split up not long after though, he looked better in most of it than I did.

Couldn't do his make up for shit though. Ha.
(Fri 16th Mar 2007, 17:38, More)

» Best Graffiti Ever

This was on the back of the Opera House in Scarborough...
...for many years till they knocked it down and turned it into a casino.

There were loads of them round town - all spelt wrong - and people had tried to add in missing letters when they realised their mistake!

Brilliant stuff.

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(Mon 7th May 2007, 23:19, More)
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