» Strange things you've been paid to do

I was a fudge packer
Three pounds an hour, time and a half overtime. They weren't paying me to be a bummer - it was real life fudge.
(Thu 30th Sep 2004, 14:16, More)

» Housemates

Not the housemate, but her dog
This particular housemate had a spaniel - originally intended to be trained as hearing dog for the deaf (as she was deaf) but only partially trained so pretty useless in that role. The main 'issue' with it was that it had some kind of gential lice problem that she seemed unaware of or reluctant to get sorted. It made the dog very angry and the only way he could vent his frustration was to bark at his own testicals. A lot.
(Tue 3rd Mar 2009, 11:18, More)

» Have you ever been rude to a celebrity?

I was in Stringfellows one night
I'm not proud of that, but it is relevant (and someone else way paying). Anyway, through my drunken double vision I spot Damon Hill and his best mate Leo Sayer. Leo walks over to the bar to get a drink and happens to be stood next to my boss who is even more drunk than me. My boss spots him and slurs "oi, aren't you Leo Sayer?". Leo smiles in a I've-just-been-recognised-kind-of-way and says "Yes I am". My boss replies, "You know what [BURP] . . you make me feel like dancing."
Oh, Leo.
(Fri 16th Apr 2004, 10:53, More)

» My Wanking Disasters

dog wanker
i went to school with someone who ended up with a reputation he couldn't escape because he'd been caught wanking off a dog. Imagine spending your school days not just being known as 'Chris' but 'Chris the dog wanker'.
(Wed 2nd Jun 2004, 13:04, More)

» Shit Stories

On honeymoon
In Grenada. Days of drinking. Really hungover. Having lunch. Wanted to break wind. Followed through. Wearing white shorts. Commando. Need I say more?
(Thu 6th May 2004, 13:05, More)