» Rock and Roll Stories

The Scorpions are wimps
When I was in Cologne in 1997, some colleagues and I ended up staying in the same hotel as The Scorpions, of "Winds of Change" fame. We were all hoping to get a glimpse of the band, but all we saw was boxes full of their kit and speakers and roadies etc. We thought they'd be keeping themselves to themselves and we'd never see the mullet-ed German supergroup in the flesh- but we werent to be dissapointed. That evening we stayed in for dinner- and so did the Scorpions! Since they were sitting on the next table to us, I, admittedly having sampled a few German beers by then, thought it would be nice if they treated us to rendition of Winds of Change on the Baby Grand piano that was in the dining room. At first the band politely smiled when I shouted "hey Scorpions, give us a tune" but their smiles dissapeared when I started, by way of encouragement, to do the whistled first few bars of their big song. The louder I whistled, the more they frowned. Eventually, they sent a waiter over - "Ze Scorpions ask you not whistle their song." When I kept on doing the, by now annoying whistling, but which had our table in stitches, eventually the band got up off their table and trooped out, off to get room service or somewhere without pesky noise harrasment. I was proud as punch.
(Sun 2nd Jul 2006, 18:16, More)

» Banks

bank actually did me a massive favour
My flatmate dave was the tightest man ever, he never ever would pay his bills or buy any food. Sound irrelevant, but wait on- one month four of us in the house paid the landlord by cheque - Dave, being a miser had a load of cash and paid in notes. Mr G the landlord duly paid in the cheques to his bank - then his bank used a courier to send the cheques to our banks to be debited from our accounts - said courier LOST the cheques! Which was a double top result, since Mr G got paid by his bank, the cheques never came out of our banks and Dave was the only one to pay his rent that month to his utter disgust!
(Fri 17th Jul 2009, 14:53, More)

» Celebrity Encounters III

in your face Jason Priestly from Beverley Hills 90210
I was working with Jason Priestly from Beverley Hills 90210. I went out for a drink with him and my boss as well. It was going well until I chugged a big glug from my bottle of beck's and unfortunately someone said something funny. Leading to a shower of spit and lager shooting out my gob and soaking the Priestmeister in the face.
(Fri 6th Dec 2013, 18:06, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

World's Sickest Joke
A murdering paedo nonce and a 6 year old child are going into some dark woods together. The boy says "I'm afraid of going in the woods in the dark"
Nonce says, "how do you think I'll feel, coming back out of the woods all alone?"
(Fri 10th Sep 2004, 17:19, More)