» Birthdays

The real reason I'm not fond of football.
My worst birthday had to have been my sixth. I have mine at the end of January, and it's inevitable some years that not only did the family get together on the weekend to celebrate, but the Super Bowl usually fell on that same day. I can't remember who was playing that year, but apparently it was either a close game, or two teams my family were fond of were playing.

All of us were sitting around the table, the game muted and everyone started singing happy birthday. Unfortunately, for me, one of the men was still watching the game and my song went something like "Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you...happy birthday dear Ste--omg...run! Run!!! Touchdown!!!" And much congratulating of the winning team. I spent the rest of the day under my Nana's bed and wouldn't come out. Mom was understandably furious.
(Mon 12th Dec 2005, 15:18, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

Eee
Know this might have been posted..but I'm lazy and am going to have a go with it anyway. Heard this whilst 21 and at my very first naughty strip club. My guy friends took me out apparently thinking they could get me drunk enough to preform on amuteur night. They failed.

"What do you call a dead baby crawling up your leg?"

...A homesick abortion.
(Mon 12th Dec 2005, 16:04, More)