b3ta.com user jacob
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» Rock and Roll Stories

V Festival
One year I went back to my tent at night only to find someone already in it, enjoying a drunken sleep. We dragged him outside where he promptly woke up and ran off. He left his trousers in the bottom of my sleeping bag which contained his wallet and phone.

I phoned up his mum and explained that her son said left his trousers in my tent, to which she replied, "Oh dear, that does sound like something he'd do."

Rock on.
(Mon 3rd Jul 2006, 22:34, More)

» My most gullible moment

A friend was visiting from South Africa, and during a cross-country road trip we managed to convince him that he needed his passport to get into Wales. He didn't have it with him, so we stuffed him into the boot and told him to keep quiet while we smuggled him over the border.

To this day he brags to people about illegally sneaking into Wales.
(Wed 27th Aug 2008, 1:06, More)

» School Trips

When I was 15 I went on a school trip to Barcelona. My friends and I bought a goldfish from the market, and we managed to keep it for several days in our hotel room's bidet. By leaving the tap running on a constant trickle we were able to produce bubbles for the little chap, and we fed him 3 times a day with crumbs from bread rolls we stole out of the restaurant.

All was well until one of our group fell ill and decided to have a hot bath. None of us realised that a hot bath would change the temperature of the water flowing into the bidet. A few hours later steam was rising from a bidet full of scalding hot water and the fish was floating on its side.
(Thu 7th Dec 2006, 20:48, More)

» Going Too Far

Back in school
we had a really bitchy student teacher, so one night we decided to play a few practical jokes on her. We put bricks behind the wheels of her car so she couldn't back out of her parking space, we drew big cocks in the condensation on the roof, and tied empty pots of Pringles to the back in 'just married' fashion.

We were cofnronted by an irate headmaster the next day. We tried to deny some of the charges so we were asked to write an account of what happened from our point of view.

We probably took it too far when we returned with a neatly bound, professionally printed 12-page document outlining the events complete with photos labelled 'Fig.1.2'...etc
(Sun 12th Nov 2006, 3:32, More)

» Apparently I'm a sex offender

Koreans and cameras
6 months ago I moved to New Zealand to start university, and in my hall of residence I was made to share a room with a Korean because we were both international students.

He was always in bed which made life very difficult for me, and made taking photos of my room to show friends back home even more difficult. I tried to keep his bed out of the pictures, but unfortunately I managed to take one which included his foot poking out from underneath his duvet.

A few days later I was confronted by an irate roommate who'd obviously been looking at the pictures on my camera. "You took a photo of me while I was alseep!" he shouted. And then added the classic quote, "Do you think this is normal behaviour?"

I didn't really know what to say so I remained quiet while he went on to say that he'd already been downstairs to inform the management. I was moved the very next day.
(Sat 19th Aug 2006, 0:29, More)
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