b3ta.com user Odinsdottir
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My first ever use of the talk board and within moments I am worse than 1,000 Hitlers. Surely that's a record.

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Body Horror
God was drunk when he made me. I have a nonmalignant brain tumour, IBS, fibromyalgia and two types of migraine along with gynae trouble that even other women get all squicky about... But the nastiest thing yet happened to me about two hours ago.

I am a jeweler and this morning I was setting a stone. I was putting rather a lot of pressure on a tool made of a sliver of steel, which unbeknownst, was flawed.

It snapped with enough force to rip my fake and real nail almost completely off. The very nice ambulance man gave me gas and air (which is goooood shit, believe you me, and a fine substance with which, due to my various ills, I am well acquainted) so that he could pull it off completely as leaving the mm or so left would just catch on everything and be a nuisance.

So today I got to watch some bloke rip my finger nail off.

Is my index finger on my right hand for extra inconvenience.

Since I take massive pain meds as due course due to being a lazy cripple, I didn't raise much of a fuss, so my colleagues think I'm well hard. On the phone to my better half in the loo, however, I was a blubbering mess.

Edit: the root of your nail, ie, the bit under the cuticle is surprisingly long, many mm, thus how dead folks' nails seem to grow as the skin rots and draws up.
(Fri 2nd Aug 2013, 15:02, More)

» Iffy crushes

Dame. Helen. Mirren.
(Fri 7th Oct 2011, 14:20, More)

» B3TA fixes the world


"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects."

(Big nod to moonmonkey and others.)
(Thu 29th Sep 2011, 10:07, More)

» Conspicuous Consumption

Champagne Bar...
St Pancras. IFIC, £480.
(Thu 28th Jul 2011, 13:47, More)

» Meeting people from the internet

Met three men...
on OKCupid. One was a hairy, chain smoking, smelly troll, one I shagged in about 10 minutes of meeting, ( a delicious thing, still mates) and I married the third.

No I tell a lie; there was a fourth, the primary school teaching tranvestite who texted me that he didn't want to see me again as I was weird. Am sitting here, so proud!

So I suppose it was some game of flee, freak out, shag, marry.
(Thu 20th Oct 2011, 13:41, More)
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