Daily Mail
The Amish Wife drags a fetid copy into the house on a semi-regular basis.

On the other hand, it is quite medically useful, as if you find yourself with dangerously low blood pressure, you can just start reading it. And if you have dangerously high blood pressure, you can just tear it into a million pieces, or set fire to it.

The Saturday TV section is quite good, though. <goes for shower>
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 12:07, 5 replies)

My in-laws
say they only buy the DM for the TV section, which is apparently the best. Doesn't explain why they buy it all week though.
(Smale is stuffed, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 12:21, closed)

I used to work with someone who bought it
I'd piss myself laughing at a section called "you're a genius"

Basicly it was Daily Mail's top tips made 1000000 times funnier because they are not supposed to be funny. Written in earnest by Mrs D Penwithy of Brighton
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 12:31, closed)

Divorce
That is all.
(leviticus no longer likes the cut of your gib on, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 13:19, closed)

Wasn't there something in your book about this?
"He must not marry a widow, a divorced woman, or a woman defiled by the Daily Mail, but only a virgin from his own people."

Lev 21:13-15
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 14:20, closed)

hahaha
I think that's the only reference to the Daily Mail in the bible though, apart from that allusion to Richard Littlejohn tucked away in Revelations.
(leviticus no longer likes the cut of your gib on, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 15:39, closed)