Was going to post this in the "collections" QOTW
but I think it's equally apt here.

Being two 14-year-old males growing up in a tiny Devon village with zero corner shops from which to buy pron, we had to make do with whatever we could get our hands on.

It all started with the best intentions. When we weren't setting fire to cars or burning down barns, we tried to do our bit for the environment by starting the incredibly gay Village Environment Group. We decided to help out around the village by digging out a pond and collecting people's newspapers for recycling.

One old man in the village used to get the Sun newspaper, and we'd always go straight to page three - which, for the non-Brits amongst you, always features some young lass with her baps out. Me and my friend kept a small box of neatly-folded pages, each showing a beauty in a state of undress. We'd share it, and add to it whenever we collected more newspapers for "recycling" - which eventually degraded to cutting out page three and sticking the rest in the normal bin to go straight to the landfill.

We'd also "entertain" ourselves with the contents of the box - my favourite picture being of a girl I named "Evian" due to her emptying the contents of a bottle of the afforementioned water all over her norks. Why I didn't refer to her by her real name, which was clearly printed on the page, I'll never know.

I always did my utmost to ensure that the box was well hidden in my room, usually under my bed, lest my parents discover it. So, I was slightly shocked after returning from a week away to find my mum had tidied my room. She'd sorted through all my papers and letters (I have no idea how I'd accumulated so many at 14), and put them in nice cardboard boxes, labelled them and put stacked them in my cupboard.

And also, at the top of the cupboard, was the page three box. Trembling slightly at the thought of my mum discovering my stealthy stash of softcore nudity, I picked it up and slowly rotated it to reveal to my horror that mum had neatly inscribed the word "cuttings" on the side of the box. I'm not sure if she was in denial about my coming of age, or just thought I had a strong interest in certain pages of the Sun newspaper.
( krang, Thu 25 Jan 2007, 16:54, Reply)