Good news on the mental ex and sprog situation Monters.
This weekend I will be mainly looking at the sky and praying that it doesn't fucking rain any more, before hopefully playing cricket Saturday and Sunday, and going over to see my sister and family on Sunday night.

I then appear to have jury duty next week. This should be most lolsome.

Can anyone offer any pointers? I was just going to go with the 'no smoke without fire' gambit, i.e. he's guilty, send him down, etc and then we can be in the pub before lunchtime. Make sense?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 11 May 2012, 10:09, 4 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Tell the judge that the case you are given is dull and you want to deal with one that's more violent for the lols.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:11, Reply)

why is everyone say good news? what is the good news

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:13, Reply)

Monty has beheaded his ex with a samuri sword.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:14, Reply)

not AGAIN
i hope that she was a pimp so that he will get away with it
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:17, Reply)

Judge the defendant entirely on their appearance.
Some features to watch out for include:
eyes too close together
dark or swarthy complexion
tattoos on face, neck or hands
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:14, Reply)

*makes notes*

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 11 May 2012, 10:17, Reply)

I hear that a prominent bone ridge on the skull
over the occipital node is a clear indication of criminality.
( Kroney, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:17, Reply)

Is this some Klingon thing?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:18, Reply)

No

( Kroney, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:19, Reply)

I have a tattoo on my wrist which is pretty easy to conceal when teaching. Occasionally the litl'uns see it though and ask "Mr C why have you drawn on yourself?". Apart from the chav kids who go "ooooh tattoo"
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:18, Reply)

My daughter drew a goatee beard on her face with permanent marker last night.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:22, Reply)

Is this one of the reservations that your ex wants to discuss?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:25, Reply)

No, she has an interest in Native American housing settlements and knows it's a specialist field of mine.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:27, Reply)

Wanting to be a pirate? not uncommon. I had two paint them on whilst on teaching practice last year. It's very amusing.
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:28, Reply)

Copying daddy's beard I think.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:30, Reply)

Lusty?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:30, Reply)

Ha!

( Kroney, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:35, Reply)

Cheers Revski.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:18, Reply)

Good morning Legless.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 11 May 2012, 10:19, Reply)