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This is a question Devastating Put-Downs

Amorous Badger says: I once saw a former manager of mine being asked to 'sit down and let your mouth have a chance to speak' by his senior. What's the best heckle/putdown/riposte you've ever seen? (Hint: Recycled 'Your mum' jokes does not make an answer)

(, Thu 24 Nov 2011, 15:15)
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Where's the fire?
A traffic warden pounced on my mate's car as he popped into a house for a minute or two. When he emerged to find the warden writing a ticket, he naturally objected because he'd only been a short while.

"That's not the point, is it sir? What if there had been a fire? The fire engine wouldn't be able to get past, and lives could be put at risk."

"Well," replied my mate, "I'm a fireman, and you're a sanctimonious little Hitler, because we wouldn't come this bloody way."
(, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:48, 7 replies)
Haha
Excellent :D
(, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:53, closed)
I've never understood this mindset.
"I'm parking illegally, but when I get a ticket I'm going to moan my tiny penis off about it".

Doesn't matter how long you're there, it's still parking illegally, sure, I do it, but I wouldn't whinge about it if I got caught.
(, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 15:38, closed)
+1
If you do the crime, you must be capable of MTFU when you get caught.
(, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 15:56, closed)
Unlawfully
Not illegally. It's not a criminal offence.
(, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 18:20, closed)
this
I park outside the pie shop on the way to work all the time. if I get a ticket it's my own fault and I'm still up on the deal.
(, Sat 26 Nov 2011, 18:00, closed)
they would if it was his house on fire.

(, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:12, closed)
unless his wife was at home and he wanted the life insurance

(, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:36, closed)

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