Illness...
In my experience women are sexist towards men when it comes to any form of illness. The slightest complaint of ill health is met with extreme disdain, whereas when a woman is unwell a man has to be sympathetic or there's trouble.

How did this disparity arise?

Women are shit at conceding that a man might feel remotely ill and require the smallest bit of sympathy.
( TheFinch is getting to grips with the complex plane on, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 21:20, 4 replies)

On the road
Women are good drivers. The reason being is that they don't have a load of testosterone making them hot-headed, over confident and prone to showing off.

However, they can be so inconsiderate. At the end of my street is a T-junction. One that is busy enough from each direction to warrant a mini-roundabout. Consequently, turning right is a pain in hole (either down the side-road or out onto the main road). Other drivers will stop and let you out. I've been keeping track, and I've found that it's very rare that a women driver will stop - even if they're waiting to turn right down the side street. I need a break in both lanes in traffic, she's stopped one of them and so it isn't to much to ask to just let me out.

And they can be such ingrates. In the above situation, if I stop and let a women driver turn right, I very rarely get any acknowledgment.

Men: Take note, and you'll see what I mean

Women: Prove me wrong.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 21:02, 6 replies)

Hur hur hur women lol

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 20:53, Reply)

I don't like talking to women.
I'm not intimidated by them or anything - it's not like I'm scared to talk to them. I just find them very boring.

When I applied to the Royal Navy, I put down the submarine service because they don't let women in. It's bad enough with the wife at home - I don't want to have to spend 6 months at sea with women as well.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 20:39, 2 replies)

Women

Snakes with tits....

(I'm not bitter...)
(woo first post!)
(bangthedrum, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 20:39, 4 replies)

MUSIC
I have rather large and eclectic collection of music that I've plundered from the interwebs over the years (about 50 Gig) mainly consisting of rock, indie and electronica.
One startling thing I've noticed is that I only have the work of one female musician (Bjork) and only about 2 albums on which a female singer features prominently. Usually women, where they do exist in the music I own are made to content themselves with the position of bassist or drummer.

This can't be simply because I don't enjoy female singing. Lots of the music I listen to is electronic and so has no vocals (such as Aphex Twin or BoC). As far as I am aware there are no female producers of this kind of music. Of course there must be, but I've not heard of any.
WHY IS THIS!?!?
One hypothesis is that teenage girls just aren't as geeky as boys, meaning that they don't spend days and days sat alone with computers or with their friends in grotty studios producing music. Or maybe it's very difficult to market the work of a woman who isn't highly visible & attractive.
Hmmmm.

Sorry for length/ incoherence of argument.
( Fitznicely into a thimble, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 20:18, 33 replies)

Knots.

It takes a real man to tie a good knot; but only women can untie them.
( Turquoise Hexagon Sun has just dropped acid on, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 20:02, 2 replies)

An open letter to... Well, quite a lot of women I've met in the past:
If you want me to do something, just ask nicely. Do not lead me on just long enough for me to do the thing, then laugh at me for allowing myself to be led on. These are two utterly different processes.

Every time this happens, I become approximately 27% more bitter.
( MatJ LOOK, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 19:44, 5 replies)

Josie Long...
Mildly amuzing on Buzzcocks, but I Googled her once. I am on medication now. Like watching a haddock flap about in the net of an innocent child. Only nowhere near as amuzing.
(mooghead, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 19:44, 1 reply)

Comedy
I was having this coversation with my dad the other day after watching shit Xmas 'funny' tv.

My opinion: Male comedians are funnier than female comedians. Granted, there are some funny lasses... but all I end up thinking is "Well, they're good... for a woman"."

Male comedians seem to be able to be funny about the world. Take Bill Hicks, Steven Wright and that lot. Brilliant and dry. Then the musicians: Tim Minchin, Bill Bailey. Then you have Dylan Moran. Ricky Gervais. Even that tv wanker Michal McIntyre. All face-achingly amusing!

I have noticed that female comedians make jokes about being a woman, or the life of a woman. Maybe putting men down for a laugh.

I know that women haven't always had it as easy as men, and perhaps still don't. It has only been in the past few generations that women have had the chance to receive similar education to men, and certainly 'male humour' is encouraged more. Things like wanking, bodily functions, toilet humour and stuff (think Russell Brand) are all 'male humour'. Perhaps women have been considered more a sidekick throughout comedy history; or perhaps men would have been given more opportunities. After all, a lot of 'women's stuff' would have been thought of as taboo until pretty recently, with audiences not wanting to know about that sort of thing.

Please correct me if I'm wrong. I'm not saying there are NO good female comedians, I'm sure there a lot. MORE FEMALE FUNNIES, I SAY. The hands-down WORST stand up comedian I know is a guy. And some of the most genuinely amusing people I know are women.

Toodle pip.
( d3gu thinks you should buy a Dinohoodie., Sun 27 Dec 2009, 19:35, 17 replies)

Why men are better than women
...as explained by Dave Hiroshima and Steve Nagasaki.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=69J-bwdNobw

Oh, hang on... this isn't /links. Bollocks, I think I took a wrong turning somewhere.
( Dave McF wrote some words on, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 19:19, Reply)

I used to think women were universally not funny...
then I watched some Janeane Garofalo.
(chrisdood Why yes, I am the shizzle, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 18:48, 6 replies)

WHERE'S MY BLOODY TEA , WOMAN?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 27 Dec 2009, 18:46, 3 replies)

On the contrary...
I confess I used to be very wary of the fairer sex (fairer in what terms, i always did wonder) and so naturally took to the stereotypes to soothe my ills against them (and probably to mask my own personal feelings of inadequacy). After all, if being silly and good only for housestuff is in their nature, I can't really hold them against it, right?

Well, fortunately, I met this wonderful young lady (who decided I was pleasent too, despite my faults) who turned it all on it's head. Honestly, the girl is a walking advertisement for all the best parts of the XX brigade and more besides. Freed thus from the shackles of ignorance, I resolved to see how far the tables could turn.

For example, it had long been a belief of mine that the female voice and metal music aren't really the best mix (probably due to the more prominent examples being of a more operatic persuasion, which sometimes bores me). Of course, recently I managed to overturn this belief after listening to Hellions Ann Boleyn, who impressed me sufficiently with their cover of Exciter.

As for comediennes, well... I dunno. Women can be funny, and often are, but I've not found a current stand up who raised titters from me (mind you, i can say that about a lot of comedians too. All too often I find they really on the shock factor of what they say or are just simply annoying)

So yea, I consider men and women largely equally (by that I mean I'm a miserable misanthrope and quite happy to stay that way)

And now the obligatory joke

q. Why did the woman cross the road?

a. Never mind that, what was she doing out of the kitchen?!

And thus I finally post. I hope it wasn't too painful to read.
(Anachronist misplaced in time since, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 18:41, Reply)

Think this just about covers it.


Sorry for the embedding. I'll edit it out if anyone feels it offends them enough.

Credit obviously goes to xkcd.
(Martin1337 was trying and failing to be funny at, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 18:17, 2 replies)

Poker
Women are shit at poker. Way too conservative and predictable in their play, and assuming it's real world poker (as opposed to the online nonsense), they tend to kill the (sophomoric and sexist) banter at a table.
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 18:11, 5 replies)

Women....
...Like terrible television. This is demonstrated by the continuing existence of waterloo road
(Monkeyofspong, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 18:03, 1 reply)

No squaws at the match
Proper Women do not want to go to football, rugby. Especially fucking snooker and darts.

Total waste of a seat.
(cymrococh, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 18:01, Reply)

Women KNOW YOUR LIMITS
This video is very sexist

www.youtube.com/watch?v=LS37SNYjg8w
(WhataYob, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 17:58, 1 reply)

Women in science, engineering, maths etc.
Now I'm not saying that no women are good at these, that would be blatantly rubbish as I know many women who excel at these things (hopefully me included since I'm female and trying to do a PhD in physics), but I honestly think that a vision of a world where the gender split is 50/50 is just a bra burning feminists fantasy. Why? I honestly think that these things do appeal less to the average woman than the average man, and the average man is probably better at them. I hope no-one was stupid enough to interpret that as "I think all men are better than all women at maths" as that really would be sexist. I'm all for making sure girls know enough about these subjects to decide whether they like them and making sure they're not being put off by stereotypes rather than their own opinion, but if a girl doesn't want to be a scientist FFS just let her do her own thing.

The main thing that makes me think the ratio of men to women at least in physics (being a physicist I know most about gender ratios in that than jobs I don't do) is never going to be more even than about 70:30 is law and medicine. Both very traditionally mens jobs, yet today, I believe far more girls want to study them at uni than boys. The days of girls being put off because something is a man's area of interest are more or less over.

I think the other way around may be a problem (I woulnd't be surprised if men are feeling put off girls' subjects because of the stereotype), but no-one gives a shit when men are in the minority.
(GothicTechie, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 17:52, 10 replies)

Barbecues.
Now don't get me wrong, I can grill up a storm on my bbq when I'm cooking for myself. Never mind the standard steaks, sausages and burgers, I've been known to cook a whole joint of beef, a whole chicken, that kind of thing on my grill. When I'm hungry and home alone.

When I have friends round however, if there's a bloke around, he gets the bbq duties.
I'm sorry, but men are soooo much better at grilling than women regardless of how well us lasses can do it ourselves!
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 17:35, 3 replies)

Funny women
No such thing. Women can't tell jokes or pull funny faces or do anything funny at all. Yes there are some female comedians but they aren't funny.
(richard pye, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 17:35, 5 replies)

I'm not sure if this is sexist, but any excuse will do.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-E4aKHE59s

Note: Tim Minchin is amazing.
(mmmm curry doesn't really understand this sig lark, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 17:27, Reply)

Adverts
particular those for things like cleaning products and lately cold remedies.

A spate of these have shown men as weak, complaining and incapable. I'm not saying that it is not the case, but the double standards shown there are quite annoying. If it were saying the same things about a woman there would be complaints I'm sure.

Equal rights (almost put Rites!) and treatment works both ways.

My personal philosophy is that men and women were created equal. Equally fucking stupid.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 17:13, 2 replies)

O.o
My flatmate has just given me, as a Christmas present, an 'Ex Lover Voodoo Doll'.

It is one of those squeezy dolls and is emblazoned with imagined chakras accompanied by phrases such as 'You will pay', 'You still love me' and 'Stop bitching behind my back'.

I find it:

a) Creepy
b) A strange choice of present, since I am close friends with every single one of my exes (as she knows)
c) Quite sad

I don't want it in my house in case people think I willingly procured such a product, and I don't want to give it to a charity shop because I don't want to spread pointless bile. Thus I am going to have to bin it when she's not looking.

EDIT: I have just noticed that it comes complete with pins. I am now even more creeped out.
(clumsyeloquence is a girl, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 16:42, 3 replies)

An Inconsistent Triad
Consider the judgment; "men and women are equal, and therefore deserve equal rights" that is thrown about by feminists. Now consider the following:

1. Men and women are equal.

2. Two things are only equal if and only if they both share all of the properties of the others. (Leibniz PWNS)

3. Men have cocks, women have boobies.

The three statements plainly cannot all obtain:

If 1 and 2 are true, then 3 must be false.
If 2 and 3 are true, then 1 must be false.

2 is mathematically and A PRIORI true, 3 is demonstrably true, yet we can find no proof for 1.

Therefore, 1 is false. Men and Women are not equal.

Conclusion:

If equal rights are to be distributed and "deserved" on account of equality, then women do not deserve equal rights to men, nor vice versa.

Thankyou
(Pingoo likes cheese, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 16:40, 11 replies)

sex
I can not believe that women enjoy sex....
They only do it to please their partner....
Just can't believe they like it....

But there again I'm a gayer so what would I know....
(acerboyz, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 16:30, 6 replies)

Women in IT
I'm sorry, but they are just denying a man the chance of a real job.

There. Said it on teh interwebs.
( Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 16:27, 3 replies)

Is this sexist though?
If God was a man, surely he'd have designed a more efficient means of reproduction?

rafter
baz
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Sun 27 Dec 2009, 16:21, Reply)