So while we are on the subject of food .....
Branston Pickle!

With or without bits?

www.premierfoods.co.uk/brands/branston.cfm

Quote :

Branston Small Chunk: with smaller vegetable chunks, Branston Small Chunk is perfect for sandwiches.

Branston Smooth: all the tang without the chunks, Branston Smooth is perfect with chips or burgers, BBQs or pizza.

Branston Rich & Fruity: A great tasting tangy fruity sauce to add a kick to bacon sandwiches and cooked breakfasts.

Branston Spicy: your favourite combination of tanginess with the added kick of chilli and spices.
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:47, archived)

branston smooth
does it exist? shirley there's only the decision on bit size to be made?

edit: arf, i just made up branston smooth...
( Gnoll, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:48, archived)

It exists
We now have big bits, small bits and no bits!
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:49, archived)

Just like norks really

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:59, archived)

Bits of what?

with
( Newington, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:48, archived)

.
Pickle
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:49, archived)

you do realise that you dont need the full stop?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:50, archived)

.
nope
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:51, archived)

Hahaha!
.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:52, archived)

Aaah
*stops trying to wipe fly off monitor*
( Newington, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:51, archived)

Ive actually been doing that everytime she posts...

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:55, archived)

.
well bugger me!
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:57, archived)

*buggers*

/predictable
( Dekazer, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:59, archived)

Hot girl-on-girl action
*films with shakey camera-work*
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:01, archived)

You are John Leslie
AICMFP
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:03, archived)

ARE YOU
COMPARING ME TO ABI TITMUSS? Come here and say that to my face, fucker!

*squares up*
( Dekazer, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:05, archived)

Pffft
you said "tit"

pffft.

Abi Tit-Muff

*collapses in schoolboy style giggle fit*
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:07, archived)

Are you a bland-faced slapper who's fucked a sub-minor-celebrity?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:07, archived)

2 outta 3 ain't bad I guess.

( Dekazer, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:08, archived)

I wish...
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:07, archived)

*spang*

( Dekazer, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:08, archived)

God no
Shes really hot!


*runs fast*
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:07, archived)

I can wait
Mykey, I can wait..

*plots*
( Dekazer, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:08, archived)

Im not getting involved with you and Fenris' filthy activities!


Well, maybe if you ask nicely...
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:10, archived)

There is no bed
built strong enough for the both of us...
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:13, archived)

Oh come now
you arent that big;)
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:14, archived)

Gets out the
Branston Smooth!
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:13, archived)

I like my pickle like my women,
chunky*

*not really, I believe being fat is morally wrong.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:50, archived)

morally and ferally wrong

( Gnoll, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:51, archived)

If I were prime minister, I would have all fat people killed.
/tom baker
( ArthurTheRat, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:53, archived)

I like my pickle like my women;
diced up and stuffed in jars.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:53, archived)

uppity pfft

( Gnoll, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:54, archived)

I think
I love you.
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:55, archived)

It's ok
it'll pass.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:57, archived)

I like my pickle like my women;
pumped full of spunk, right up to the ears*

*or lid.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:55, archived)

stored in vinegar
and shut in a cupboard.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:56, archived)

Spread on cheese sandwiches
/drifting off-course
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:57, archived)

Pickle without bits
is just vinegar, surely? Or is Branston Smooth just regular pickle that's been pureed?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:51, archived)

Now
thats gonna bug me all day.
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:52, archived)

The Rich & Fruity and Spicy options, I can understand,
that's just changing the flavour to suit. The Small Chunk I can understand, too, for sandwich purposes. But the Smooth? How can it be pickle, if theres nothing pickled in it? It's just Brown Sauce (which is an already crowded market), surely?

What a load of marketing wank.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:59, archived)

the second one.
and it is good
( Fergburger, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:00, archived)

Perhaps it's marketed at the elderly,
so they can still enjoy pickle, without having to put their teeth in?

Or are you just too lazy to chew your food?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:02, archived)

Branston smooth
on mike shinoda's naked chest....

Id give it a go.
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:05, archived)

I had to Google to find out who he is.
Now, my cache makes me look
a) gay
or
b) schoolgirlish.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:08, archived)

yes
I'm not proud of the fact I would have wild monkey sex with him in front of my nan but hey what can you do.
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:11, archived)

With
the fact that you even ask shows you suspect us to be effete cunts.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:51, archived)

yup
and your point is?

/slaps

this is B3ta boy!
( Zenith - SAVE THE DUCKS!, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:53, archived)

What an effete slap
I shall busy myself removing the chunks from your pickle* forthwith.

*now if that's not a euphemism, I don't know what it.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:56, archived)

Branston pickle
is made by force feeding swans bovril and getting them to spew up to provide all the chunky bits.

it's sick, immoral and wrong.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:55, archived)

I think
by b3ta standards it also counts as salad.
( Dekazer, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:57, archived)

Nazi

( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:01, archived)

no, pygmies. but similar
/ac
( Gnoll, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:03, archived)

They used
my work as a film set for a film about pygmies. I can't wait..
( Dekazer, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:06, archived)

you work for amazon
AICMFP
( Gnoll, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 11:11, archived)

with
and not the gay "smaller chunks" - anyone who can't manage to make a sandwich with normal sized chunks should be being fed with a plastic spoon.

although the aforementioned smooth is mighty tasty as a ketchup-type condiment.

that is all.
( Fergburger, Wed 13 Apr 2005, 10:56, archived)