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# You think you have problems?
In the park opposite our house, a man in a kilt is playing bagpipes. They are louder than you would think possible for an unamplified instrument.
This might be unexceptional in Scotland, but in London SE5 it is a little unusual.
(I helped save b3ta! Cassidy : Vissi d'arte, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:19, archived)
# Bagpipes...
...are designed to be incredibly loud, in order to annoy English people. It seems to work.

If he is disturbing you, then I would ask him politely to practice another time.
(I helped save b3ta! Mystery_Bob, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:23, archived)
# Or
stamp on his bagpipes.
(I helped save b3ta! GR33DY, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:26, archived)
# Or
see if he can play them as competently with his arse.
(Ron Hard, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:28, archived)
# I dare say
it wouldn't sound any different.
(I helped save b3ta! sp3ccylad carries on breathing all the way up to, say, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:31, archived)
# All becomes plain.
He seems to have stopped now, so perhaps he feels that he has done enough to persuade us of the virtues of Scottish culture.
(I helped save b3ta! Cassidy : Vissi d'arte, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:30, archived)
# No doubt
he's gone off to drink shedloads of whisky and chiv total strangers.
(Ron Hard, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:33, archived)
# This is a tolerant multicultural neighbourhood,
where we abhor such stereotyping.
Even of Scots.
(I helped save b3ta! Cassidy : Vissi d'arte, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:36, archived)
# Sorry, only joshing.
You may now untwist your knickers.
(Ron Hard, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:38, archived)
# So much for irony.
(I helped save b3ta! Cassidy : Vissi d'arte, Sat 13 Sep 2003, 10:51, archived)