Whilst we're on the subject of universities...I go to Cambridge Uni. One thing I have learned for myself and nobody has had to teach me is that no matter how rich your parents are, no matter how much per term your school fees were, no matter how many A-levels you did or how exotic your gap year was, it does not guarantee you will have any social skills whatsoever when it comes to sharing a kitchen.
Really. It makes me consistently laugh. There is one such chap who lives opposite me on my corridor. He's a third year musician, fabulously eloquent, plays for God knows how many orchestras, ensembles, choirs etc. And then he'll get back, cook himself and his pissy friends some overpriced pasta and then leave the stuff in the sink for me to find three days later.
Unfortunately I'm too polite to mention it to him so it's going to have to run for now.
And I think the girl next door might be dead. In no uncertain terms I can confirm that I have not seen her living form in four weeks. I can't even confirm that I've heard voices or movement from her room. It's probably not like she's disappeared off the face of the earth, because the college would have people go out and look for her. And this being her third year it's unlikely that she's dropped out.
I suppose I could tape something across her door which would break if it was opened, thus confirming someone is using the room. Unfortunately the cleaners come every day. Maybe I could find her email address?
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Tue 18 Nov 2003, 0:33,
archived)
Really. It makes me consistently laugh. There is one such chap who lives opposite me on my corridor. He's a third year musician, fabulously eloquent, plays for God knows how many orchestras, ensembles, choirs etc. And then he'll get back, cook himself and his pissy friends some overpriced pasta and then leave the stuff in the sink for me to find three days later.
Unfortunately I'm too polite to mention it to him so it's going to have to run for now.
And I think the girl next door might be dead. In no uncertain terms I can confirm that I have not seen her living form in four weeks. I can't even confirm that I've heard voices or movement from her room. It's probably not like she's disappeared off the face of the earth, because the college would have people go out and look for her. And this being her third year it's unlikely that she's dropped out.
I suppose I could tape something across her door which would break if it was opened, thus confirming someone is using the room. Unfortunately the cleaners come every day. Maybe I could find her email address?
find out!find out!
and tell us!
reply to me when you've found out!
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Tue 18 Nov 2003, 3:25,
archived)
and tell us!
reply to me when you've found out!
Mission underway.Update on the situation. I have taped a hair across her door, fairly low down so she shouldn't notice. I did it at about 2am this morning, and it hasn't been broken yet. It's only 12pm though so no worry yet.
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Tue 18 Nov 2003, 12:15,
archived)
so?is it broken? what will you do if it never breaks?
she hasn't moved out on the very quiet has she?
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Wed 19 Nov 2003, 19:51,
archived)
she hasn't moved out on the very quiet has she?
How fascinating...Hmm, yeah, I used to do that to see if anyone secretly violated my privacy and opened the box I had stuffed under my bed marked PRIVATE & CONFIDENTIAL. Interestingly enough the piece of cotton I used was always broken, so I set up surveillance using movement tripped video cameras and a rottweiller. Worked a treat.
Do tell us what happens won't you. Why don't you climb out the window and look in hers? Or better still, why don't you just knock on her door and then go in and see for yourself? Erm, too obvious??
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Thu 20 Nov 2003, 2:16,
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Do tell us what happens won't you. Why don't you climb out the window and look in hers? Or better still, why don't you just knock on her door and then go in and see for yourself? Erm, too obvious??
ifthe cleaners come every day, I am sure they would have spotted a decomposing corpse in there
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Thu 20 Nov 2003, 14:16,
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Rotting CorpsesAnd let's not forget the many flies that would be all over the place by now.....lovely stuff decomposition.
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Fri 21 Nov 2003, 2:09,
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moneybagsRich cranberry are the worst roommates. once i lived with two such fuckers. One day they decided to be oh so commoner and "cook dinner" with their slag girlfriends. They bought a huge, hardback cookbook just for the occasion, which they used to learn how to cook...pasta with tomato sauce! After their jolly old fun at the stove and thoroughly quaint evening at the dinner table, they left the dishes they'd used in the sink for over a week, including my pots and pans. They obviously decided never to try their hand at cooking again, and the book was left sitting on the stove-top, covered in crusted tomato sauce.
I came home from work one night and asked them to clean their mess up because I tired & wanted to make something to eat. When I came out and saw that the mess was still there, I picked up their cookbook and threw it at them with full force, screaming "you fucking rich zeppelin, clean up my fucking dishes!!"
Very satisfying, and it got a response too.
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Thu 20 Nov 2003, 23:30,
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I came home from work one night and asked them to clean their mess up because I tired & wanted to make something to eat. When I came out and saw that the mess was still there, I picked up their cookbook and threw it at them with full force, screaming "you fucking rich zeppelin, clean up my fucking dishes!!"
Very satisfying, and it got a response too.
I used to live with such fuckersthe answer is to take said dishes after the allotted 'time-out' period, go to their bedrooms, pull back the sheets and dump the said dishes upside down. Don't forget to pull the shhets back to their original position. Works a treat when they're out on the piss, but in practice whether or not they are actually in their bed at the time of dumpage is irrelevant
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Fri 21 Nov 2003, 10:12,
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moneybagsDo what I did. Stop buying bogroll Wipe your arse on the middle of their bedsheet. They wont dare ask you if you did it. I did it for 4 months to the C#Nt. I'm sure he thought that he was leaving giant skidders himself.
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Fri 21 Nov 2003, 11:08,
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U*hNaa just a c3nt who will go to any extreme for a quiet life.
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Fri 21 Nov 2003, 11:22,
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Another update on my Shallow Grave-esque conundrum.What started as a uneasy joke between a few of my friends at Uni (and on this board) has gone a bit out of control and I don't think I should post any more. A few infuential people heard, apparantly, and the police and the college are both involved now.
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Fri 21 Nov 2003, 11:50,
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