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# She's a 5ft 9, slim, blonde, pretty VIRGIN.
At 18. I have no idea how she's managed it in our town. And she's nice, too.

My lovely little thing. Bless her, I can see her at the moment, dancing by the fax machine.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:24, archived)
# You ask your staff if they're virgins?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:28, archived)
# No, she's also a friend.
Who told me she ran away from some bloke in a club because she let slip to him she was a virgin and he wouldn't leave her alone after that.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:33, archived)
# Surely a virgin's not the best choice for a one-night stand.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:36, archived)
# You'd think.
I used to collect them, maybe he does.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:38, archived)
# *wants*
*has a girlfriend already*

*cries*
(I helped save b3ta! Sir T. Skellington, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:28, archived)
# Whoever gets this one will be a very lucky person.
She's a proper little love.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:34, archived)
# Clearly she either has massive personality defects (hurrah for personality defects)
or is secretly a vampire just kills the men instead.
(Jeru War and Piss, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:33, archived)
# I was about to say, that sounded quite hopeful.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:34, archived)
# Hopeful as in I am trying to fish for girlfriends?
I pray I still have enough credibility to not do that, yet.
(Jeru War and Piss, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:38, archived)
# Ah, that depends on how much credibility I afford you.
edit: in my eyes, obviously. Not anyone else's.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:39, archived)
# A couple of ounces possibly.
I knew a girl once, shocking I know, and she'd come off badly out of a relationship but decided to abandon all her brilliantly quirky personality defects. Refuse to admit that she had any anxieties or neurosises and then just turned into a combination of boring methodist and very dull happy-to-be-pissed student.

A combination which is as confusing contradicting as it is a massive waste of an amusing person.
(Jeru War and Piss, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:42, archived)