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I've done too much of that recently.

Digestive...issues.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 22:45, archived)

Mmmm that makes me think of digestive biscuits.

I also have a shit (chortle) digestive system. I did for a short time manage to have a shit more regularly than one every week, or sometimes two weeks, but it seems I am back to that now.

I swear I need to replace it with a furnace as soon as possible, it's just annoying and rubbish. Plus it creates the most sharp and short indescribable pelvic pain imaginable.

(Jeru War and Piss, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 22:48, archived)

Oh I've just got IBS.

And I've eaten a LOT of fruit recently. Ow.

You could try going totally macrobiotic.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 22:50, archived)

Or as I call them 'hype-yoghurts'.

What's painful about fruit? I can't say I actually know what IBS constitutes, other than your bowels are irritable.

I seem to get the most immeasurable pain in my pelvis occasionally though, it's just one of those twinges. But it's sort of like having a thousands of tiny redhot meathooks stabbed into you and shook about.

(Jeru War and Piss, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 22:54, archived)

You could have it, I get them.

I don't know if there's any other types, but basically my intestines instead of working rhythmically to move stuff along, they do some mental jazz stuff and get all confused.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:01, archived)

Hmmm, doesn't sound like me.

Mine just don't really shift anything and end up compressing a week or moresworth of food down into practically dark matter. Which admittadly does eventually become quite uncomfortable although it's more on the whole lower colon and pelvis region than the actual digestive tract.

(Jeru War and Piss, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:06, archived)

Doctor with you. Get to the.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:13, archived)

I am a man. I am also insane.

I think you can see the inevitable conclusion.

(Jeru War and Piss, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:16, archived)

No harm in telling you, it's what women do.

Go to the doctor, please for fuck sake stop snoring, you never listen, why don't we ask that man over there on the bench etc etc etc.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:18, archived)

I don't snore.

And all the females i've known, despite being the type who always complain about males closed emotional nature, are fucking shit when you actually try to talk to them - as are all people. It's just a fall back so they can complain about something.

I have no idea what the bench comment was about. Dogging in parks?

(Jeru War and Piss, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:21, archived)

Hopefully.

I'm excellent to talk to. I pay attention for at least five minutes before zoning out and thinking about ice cream.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:24, archived)

I can go on forever. I have found few people able to withstand it.

And I talk quite a lot too!

(Jeru War and Piss, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:28, archived)

*smacks head*

If I can smoke and have coffee you're fine. My best mate has not shut up since I met her, bless her wonderful little heart.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:29, archived)

Well I tend to only talk about very grave and serious matters these days. Shame, as I used to be quite fun.

Although thankfully I've not given up being weirdly comical about the whole depressing void of existance, it confuses the happy and the depressed alike.

(Jeru War and Piss, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:34, archived)

Most things confuse me

to a greater or lesser degree.

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Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 1 Apr 2008, 23:40, archived)